Night

Night Jokes

My dad...came over late at night...he was drunk...he started telling me how useless I was...then I went to the kitchen grabbed a knife and stabbed him in the chest 47 times......3 minutes later......he died........now I’m losing mind..and cutting myself....

There was once a kid named Timmy. His father & mother went to bed one night and didn't hear or see Timmy come with them. They all get under the covers Timmy, still unnoticed, looks under the covers and lets out a blood curdling scream. "MOMMY WATCH OUT THERE IS A SNAKE GOING INTO YOUR BIG BLACK HAIRY BUSH!" And he proceeds to say, "DON'T WORRY MOMMY I'LL GET IT!" And he takes his fathers penis in his mouth and chomps down. Now I want you to think what their breakfast conversation was the next morning.

4

There was a man he came home with his friends from the bar and man; was he ever wasted. Their friends made sure to get him home safely the next morning he woke up and found blood all over his night stand he called his friends and asked for his alarm clock back.

Susie was in her mother's room one night. As her mother was getting ready for bed. She had slipped off her blouse, her boobs plum and perky. Susie had asked what are those and will i get them? Her mother had said they were boobs and she would grow some in a few year's. Her mother told susie to find her father and say goodnight. So susie left, headed down the hall to the bathroom where her father was showering . Susie knocked on the door, he said come in. He had moved the shower curtain over just a bit. Susie said she loved him, and then seen her father's dick. Shocked, susie asked her father what that was and if she would get one. Her father said it was a dick, he said susie would get it after her mother went to bed .

3

The streets go blank in the dead of the day not a car to be seen A kingdom of corona-cation and it looks like moms the queen The wind is howling with this virus in the air Couldn't keep it in china everyone knows it's everywhere Don't let friends in don't be afraid Be the good girl you always have to be Conceal don't feel your insanity That the virus caused!! Don't let it go! Don't let it go! You have to hold it back a little more! Don't let it go! Don't let it go! Turn away and slam your doors! I don't care what the government says! Let me go to my friends house Sickness doesn't get to me anyway. It's funny how some distance makes everyone insane And the fears that once controlled me are here and present oh well! It's time to see what I can do to test the limits and break through! No right no wrong but stay inside! WERE NOT FREEEE!! Don't let it go! Don't let it go! Be one with the peace inside!! Don't let it go! Don't let it go! Watch sad movies and cry!! Here I stand!! And here I'll stay!! Cause I have nothing better to do The virus flurries through the air into my house! The storm is spiraling fear and fractals all around!! And one thought makes you wanna scream and shout out loud!! What if we never go back? What if the past is in the past???? DONT LET IT GO DONT LET IT GO!! And you'll rise at the break of noon! DONT LET IT GO DONT LET IT GO!! That's morning girl is gone!! HERE I STAND IN THE DEAD OF NIGHT CAUSE THATS WHEN I WOKE UP!! Let the virus rage on!!!!!! The sickness never gets to me anyway. DING.

9

My girl got mad at me last night for saying to my mom that she had a dildo ready at all times and is always hard so my mom wanted to see so I wiped out my penis and my mom said it’s bigger than your dads

I seen your mom at work the other night. She was talking about how good she was doing. Hands down, best $20 blowjob ever.

When i was 11 My mom came home from the bar super drunk that night and I just wanted to know if they knew where was the cat because I heard a noise.................we had a loooooooong talk the next morning.

I went out with this girl the other night, she wore this real slinky number. She especially looked great going down the stairs.