My jokes
One of my friends got a haircut, and everyone giggled and bullied him... I didn’t, I died of laughter 😂
Did you hear about that one guy who dipped his balls in paint?
My friend said they were “Pretty nuts!”
I got an iPhone 14 for my brother? That was the best trade I ever made.
I taught my dog how to play the trumpet on the London Underground over the weekend.
He went from Barking to Tooting in just under 20 minutes.
I asked my French mate if he had a games console. He said, "Oui!"
Memes
At weddings my mom always tells me I’m next. So I say the same to her, at funerals.
A "monster" that has 2 heads, 2 bodies, 6 feet, why am I not afraid of the "monster"? It's my dad riding a horse.
Tell me a joke about my hairline.
No, because he don't got one, feel like Donald Trump, it don't move.
My parents created a joke 11 years ago and people are still laughing at it, but I know it's not me because jokes have meaning.
That’s right, I have my own category😎
I lost my job at the bank. Some lady asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her.
I can get my grandma 50% off from her groceries by just scanning my wrist.
I was crying at school because my grandpa died. My friends asked what his last words were. I told them his last words were, "Are you still holding the ladder?"
I got my job at a bank and lost the job the day I got it. A lady asked me to check her balance... so I pushed her!
"Joe Biden's mom is so fat, she's very fat folks, she's so fat I'm gonna use her to build my new wall"-Trump
I went to the store because I had to go to school to run up downstairs because my phone started calling me because I was playing Mario Kart on my kitchen sink's baby grandma, like if you cry every time.
So my friend died. I was at her casket. I said I'll see you on the other side, so I went to the other side of the casket.
I didn’t realize I had to put jokes into categories, my bad.
Unleash the jokers...👍
My grandfather is a great fisherman, especially at baiting a rod.
I guess you could call him the Master Baiter.
My sister is really disrespectful, and her famous words are, "You're not my parent!" The next time she says this, I'm going to respond back with, "You're right, because I would have worn a condom to protect from you being born unlike my dad did!"