My jokes

Say the drive through at McDonald's, order (don't say the sake) but when you get it ask them, "My sake?" and say, "Sake that ass."

True story: my math teacher Mr. Ueberoth accidentally marked a Kahoot as 100 points in Google Classroom instead of 10. If he doesn't find out, the grades will be more hyperinflated than Zimbabwe's economy.

My uncle died in 9/11. He was a great pilot.

I know this is supposed to be an emo joke, but does anyone want to play Rocket League?

I'm on PS4, by the way!

My name: Box3d_by_Clapped

"HEY THAT’S MY MILK!"

Butcher knives are great tools for cutting many things!

Fruit, vegetables, my arms.

I will unplug your life support to kill my mum and then give her blood so she can bleed more.

So, when I'm about to take a shower, my mom says, "Take a shower." When I'm about to take out the trash, my mom says, "Take out the trash."

My friend died. Me and my other bestie start singing the coffin song. My bestie in the coffin, why are you not sad? Why are you still alive?

Dentist said I grind in my sleep... he a real one for that.

What's the difference between me and an orphan?

At least my dad came back.

My emo friend got jealous when my phone died.

Wanna suck my dick?

No? Well then I'm gonna go hang.

Wow, he stole my antidepressant toy. The next day, he was on the ground.

My grandma stubbed her toe in an elevator on September 21st.

Bro, my forehead is so big whenever I need to find something on it, I need the exact coordinates.

El/11: Ego, My Lego.

I broke my ankles so hard I had to walk uphill both ways.

When you say, "I wish I could cut off these bumps on my neck." (Your mom walking to you with a knife.)

Some kid: Hey, did you know there's an orphanage down the street?!

Me: NO WAY! Wanna check it out?

Kid: NO, IT'S HAUNTED!!

Me: Haunted my ass, let's go!

Kid: Wait, isn't your house also haunted???

Me: Yea