*New teacher walks in* New Teacher: Hi there, class. My name is Mr. Willy. I will be your math teacher.
*Me in shock, "Willy"* Me: Willy Wonka, is that you?
My Jokes
I will never forget my little brother's last words, RIP.
His last words: "Paint doesn't taste good."
I was anonymous with the previous jokes. I will now go by "I can fly! *falls*."
What's black and white and red all over? A mime I hit with my car.
Bro, my friend told me all his humor is dead and dry, and I was like, "Just like 9/11 victims."
I gave my blind friend a cheese grater for his birthday.
My life, ha ha funny!
Read my name. 👍🇮🇪
OWWWWWWWWWWW I JUST GOT A CUT ON MY BUTT. Oh wait, that’s always been there.
Why is my dad gone?
I don't know.
Boy: Wanna hear about my dick? Never mind, it's too short.
Girl: Wanna hear about my pussy? Fuck no, you won't get it.
I'm so proud of my grandpa, he killed Hitler. WAIT-
My girl asked me if I had seen a gorilla anywhere. I told her yes, I did see one a minute ago at the Central Park Zoo. He said if you don't behave, he will take you back to the jungle and have your ass abandoned for good.
If someone has a gun and tries to shoot you, just say, “Hipity hoppity, that gun is my property.”
Today sucked. My friend fell off a cliff, and I went to jail.
I remember my grandad's last words: "Are you still holding the ladder?"
My wife left me and took the kids.
Me on my way to the principal's office after the trans kid told me to act my age, so I told him to act his gender.
I remember having a crush on my math teacher, so I winked at her and said, "Don't worry, babe, I'll call you later."
My dads just like my eggs... runny. 🤣😭🥺
I think my penis has facial recognition.
