My jokes
To whoever stole my antidepressants, why do you need them?
How many children does it take to change a lightbulb?
Not 15, as my basement's still dark.
My teacher got so mad at me for making 9/11 jokes, she hit me twice and I said, "Damn, got hit twice!"
An orphan once said, "I will call my mum and go home."
A homeless kid once said he will go home.
I was digging a hole in the garden when I found some gold coins.
I was about to run and tell my wife when I remembered why I was digging a hole in the garden...
Memes
I was raised as an only child, which I think was hard for my brother.
My grief counselor died.
He was so good, I don’t even care! 😂😂😂
My wife is pregnant, but when we get to the doctors, something happened...
What happened?
Answer: The husband is pregnant too, with someone else’s baby, not the wife’s baby, but the wife is pregnant with his baby.
There's a disabled kid in my class, right? Oops, should've brought my Hot Wheels tracks.
Why did the rooster cross the road?
To Cock-A-Doodle Die. Now you have a rooster pancake. My favorite. ^^
I played Rock Paper Scissors with my friend Enyaw. I cba with jokes basically me and Enyaw always scissor.
To all my haters, keep sucking. I'm about to cum.
I love when I could run through the grass and feel the wind on my face.
Then my mom told me to get off VR, and then I wheeled myself to her.
Is that my student?
Na! It is Jesus!
My dad is really angry at me for kicking the balls. He's the one that told me always aim for them. Is that why I don't have a brother?
I'm 17, right? Anyways, the other day my parents told me a joke they made 17 years ago, but they still haven't told the joke yet.
I overdosed on Viagra yesterday.
It was the hardest day of my life.
My back is straighter than I am, and I literally have scoliosis.
A boy walks up to a girl and says, "I would tell you a joke about my dick, but it’s too long."
Then the girl says, "Yeah, I would tell you a joke about my pussy, but you’ll never get it."
I'm so poor I have to put my Big Mac burger on layaway.