My jokes
My sister 🤣😂
"You have to do this," and my sister said, "Well, I don't care."
And I said, "Well, you care enough to respond back, oh my gosh!"
Once, my father came home and found me in front of a roaring fire.
That made my father very mad, as we didn't have a fireplace.
We shouldn't joke about major tragedies. My dad died in 9/11, he was Saudi Arabia's best pilot.
What do Myspace and my dad have in common?
I haven't seen them in a while.
I am in trouble. My mum asked me to get six cans of Sprite.
But I got seven Up.
My dad went for the milk, but he left his wheelchair.
The last thing I said to my dog was,
"Play dead."
I told my husband he should embrace his mistakes.
He hugged me!
I wonder if Stephen Hawking was an organ donor because I need new parts for my go-kart.
My grief counselor died. He was so good, I don’t even care.
My sister said that I need to stop with the audited butt:
I got it from her when I was born.
🎵Penaldo Thrills🎵
C’mon c’mon turn the VAR on.
It's Penalty time and it won't be long.
Gotta dive and cry some more.
It's Penalty time and it won't be long.
‘Til I Hit the floor and dive alot.
Cry some more and dive alot. That all I need, because I got u my love, Penalty.
I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandpa, not screaming in terror like all the passengers on the plane he was flying.
My great grandpa killed Hitler.
My favorite dark joke is orphan jokes. For no apparent reason.
My dad died in 9/11, and that was the second worst thing that happened to me with a plane, next to Soul Plane.
My back is straighter than I am, and I literally have scoliosis.
My 1 year old nephew had a stroke. I know, sounds bad... but he would have needed to learn how to speak and walk anyways.
An orphan once said, "I will call my mum and go home."
A homeless kid once said he will go home.