Mom

Mom jokes

My mom loves balls.

But my dad has been gone for the last 4 years.

Your mom was dating a boy that had a twin brother, but she did it with the wrong one.

Mom: I'm getting you a dog!

Me: OMG REALLY?!

Mom: Yeah, what gender do you want?

Me:...

Me: Bitch, please.

Yo mom's so fat, I went over to her house a few years ago and wanted to watch TV.

So I asked for the TV remote, and she's still trying to get it!

I saw your forehead and realized your mom and dad's foreheads were as big as yours. Also, you're gay.

Why were the Twin Towers scared at dinner?

Because their mom said, "Here comes the airplane!"

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  • There was a kid in my class who said my face looked like a physical reaction (we were learning about that stuff at the time), so I said I made a chemical reaction with his mom last night.