Mom jokes
When Little Johnny was about 3, he got curious and stuck his hand up a mannequin's pants. His mom says, "No, Little Johnny, there are teeth up there that will bite off your hand." Little Johnny thinks, "Oh no, I can't do that again."
A few years later, he was 15 and he had a girlfriend, and they were making out. She says, "Why don't you ever stick your hand up my pants?" He says, "Oh no, my mom says there are teeth that will bite off my hand up there." She says, "No, there isn't, just look!" Little Johnny looks and says, "Well, no wonder there ain't no teeth. By the way, them gums look..."
Hey, is anyone’s mom missing? Yeah, yours.
Your mom is just like Rapunzel, but instead of letting down her hair, she lets everyone down! OHHHHH!
The police: Pull over!
The kid: Do you know who my dad is?
The police: What, your mom did not tell you?
I accidentally said, "Go cry to your mom," to an orphan. 😭
I was bullying a little kid for having a purple eye and said, "Where'd you get that? Your mom? Your dad?"
After that, everyone in my group was laughing at the kid. The next day I never saw him again.
How come orphans know how to do laundry?
Cause that's usually the mom's job.
So I asked my mom for a bath bomb, she just gave me a toaster.
BULLY vs. QUIET KID
Bully: I bet your dick is as small as a Tic Tac.
Quiet Kid: That's why your mom's breath smells so good.
QUIET KID WINS
I went to ask my friend's mom if I could have a sleepover.
Then I remembered they did not have a mom or dad.
Mom: Let's have an adoption party!
Kid: *cries*
Mom: What's wrong?
Kid: I'M ADOPTED????
Like this comment if: - Your mom is sus - Your mum is sus
Dislike if: - You are horny.
Listen, if my mom sees me on Roblox at 3 a.m., she said she would bang my head against the keyboardndfndfnnckvnksdvknkdsfnvbfw.
Boy: "Hey mom, can we have ice cream?"
Orphan: "What's a mom?"
When you get mad, just punch an orphan. Who are they going to tell? Their mom?
Your Mom so fat that she went on to commit suicide, but the roof fell off.....
Orphanage kid: You’re ugly!
Kid with mother: Your mom!
Your mom's so fat that One Punch Man had to take two punches.
My mom is telling me to get off Friday Night Funkin' or she will slam my head against the keyboard: weherhrqqkh[qokqho[krq3[t4i2-4q43q343q44334q43.
For this orphan, his dad didn't only go and get the milk. His mom did too.