What kind of vacuum does an abortion centre use A: Dyson
What do you get when you cross a vacuum and a rooster?
A cock sucker
Do you want to buy my Hoover?
I mean... It's just collecting dust.
Why couldn’t people use the George Floyd action figure? Because it was vacuum sealed
why is there no woman on the moon?
because it doesnt need to be cleaned
What's a similarity between blondes and a vacuum cleaner?
You have to turn them on before they start to suck.
I had a broken vacuum, then I put a One Direction sticker on it and it suddenly sucked again.
Q. What do a prostitute and a vacuum have in common? A. If the stop sucking you can smack them till they start again.
I sold my vacuum the other day. All I got was dust and my moms wig
I went to see my grandfather in the hospital because I Wanted to get to know him better before he passed, maybe take a selfie with him. But when I got there my phone died so I unplugged a vacuum to plug in my phone, and it turns out he only knows Spanish so When he kept saying "Me desconectaste el soporte de mi vida." I thought he wanted water, but when I got back with the water he was asleep and now my phone was charged so I translated what he said. And it was "You unplugged my life support", that's when I called the doctor...
Good news is, I got one sick selfie!
Men vacuum in the same way that they have sex.
They just put it in and make some noise for 3 minutes before they collapse on the couch and think that their wife should be really happy.
What do vacuums and your mom have in common?
They both suck
What sucks but doesn't suck?
Vacuums!
I was going to tell a joke I made up about my vacuum cleaner but it sucks.
What is the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a Harley Davidson? The location of the Dirtbag.
You're like a vacuum cleaner. Why? Cause you suck.
What’s a vacuum cleaners favorite plant
Answer: SUCCulent
This joke is like a vacuum cleaner......
If your cleaning a vacuum cleaner does that make you the vacuum cleaner?
