Middle East jokes
Why are camels known as ships of the desert?
Because they’re full of Arab semen.
What is the difference between an ISIS training camp and a school?
Don't ask me, I just fly the drone.
9/11 isn't something we should joke about. Some people can remember where they were when they found out. I'll never forget where I was when I found out.
It was 9:37, September 10th, 2001. I was in a cave in Iraq when my friend Mohammad told me.
Three disabled guys (a blind man, an amputee, and a guy in a wheelchair) are flying back with the USA team from the Paralympic games in the Middle East when their plane crashes in the Sahara Desert. The three disabled guys (the only survivors) are now stranded and wait for someone to rescue them, but no one showed. They start to get real thirsty, so they decide to seek out water. The amputee leads the way, with the blind man pushing the guy in the wheelchair; and, eventually they find an oasis. The amputee leader goes into the water first, cools himself down, drinks a load of water, walks out the other side and lo and behold, he has a NEW LEG! He gets excited and encourages his friends to do the same.
The blind man offers to push the guy in the wheelchair, but he gets refused because the guy in the chair wants to be Mr. Independent and insists the blind man goes ahead first. So he goes into the water, cools himself down, drinks a load of water, walks out the other side and lo and behold, he can SEE! Now the guy in the wheelchair's getting really excited, starts pushing with all his might, goes into the water, cools himself down, drinks a load of water, and wheels out the other side. Lo and behold, NEW TIRES!!!
I called a suicide hotline in Iraq... They got excited and asked if I could drive a truck.
One of my family members died on 9/11, he was one of the best pilots in the Middle East.
You shouldn't joke about 9/11. My grampa died on 9/11. He was the best pilot in all of Saudi Arabia.
I ate the last of my Egyptian food, and now I falafel. I don't know why I made that joke. Probably just becuscus.
Let me tell you how I escaped Iraq. Iran! (;)
My name is Jafar. I come from afar. There's a bomb in my car. Allahu Akbar!
Q. How does an ISIS terrorist practice safe sex?
A. He marks the camels that kick.
I rate the atmosphere of Israel a 10/7; real good stuff there, looks like an actual movie!
What's the difference between a school in Pakistan and an Al Qaeda base?
Not too sure. I just fly the drone.
I would like to thank my favorite President Barack Obama. Sorry, Barack Obama and my uncle Obama bin Laden. I mean Osama bin Laden. Sorry, hummus in my throat.
Where does Bin Laden keep his CDs?
In Iraq.
If you call the number 800-273-8500 in Afghanistan, they say, "Can you fly a plane?"
My dad died during 9/11, he was the best pilot in all Saudi Arabia.
People should stop making jokes about major tragedies. My dad died on 9/11...
He was the best pilot in Saudi Arabia.
Got kidnapped in Iran. Luckily, I ran.
Stop making jokes about 9/11. My dad died in 9/11.
Best pilot of Southern Arabia
Allahu Akbar.