What does a cannibal call a wheelchair user? -- Meals on wheels.
Boy: mom why are drinking this disgusting red soup, I wanted salad Mom: quite son we only get this once a month
What do you call the penises of gay men that are in wheelchairs ♿ 👩🦼 meals on wheels 😋 😍 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭
best part about being an orphan?
not spending 1h30 at the table every night with your dad yelling what's 2*3!!! And you crying idk!!!
I like to eat moms spaghetti now try it with the NEWWWW VEGETTIIII, turn any vegetable into pasta
What did Eminem do when he couldn't get some of his mom's spaghetti?
Well he didn't make it back to recovery this time...
wHAT DID I EAT FOR BREAKFAST YESTERDSAY?
10 YEAR OLDS
ok so, a mole goes up to a snail and eats him. it was a seven course meal if i say so myself
Where do orphans go to get a happy meal?
Orph-Donalds
One morning peppy and George came downstairs for Breckfast but they got a plate of juicy bacon there dad had recently gone missing so they ate it quite sadly the next morning they went to school and asked their teacher what is bacon made out of the teacher replied “pigs why?”peppa and George looked horrified
Why cant a orphan go to mcdonalds theres no point in the words happy meal
I love eating pussy that’s why the animal shelter is always my go to for a good meal
A man and a woman get married. The woman was Retired hooker. The man was a poet. The man said as they did 69, you taste better than my most delecious gormet meal. The woman said, well you aren’t too bad either. But the best 69 I’ve gotten and given was harry. He did it for 24 hours nonstop. They dot divorced that night.
Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate nine. But why did seven eat nine? Because seven knew you had to have three squared meals a day
A fish was swimming around in a pond when he noticed a fly flyin around about six inches above the water. He thought, “if that fly drops six inches, I could have myself a nice meal.”
There was a bear watching the fish watching the fly. He thought, “if that fly drops six inches, that fish will come up for that fly, and I can catch that fish and have myself a nice meal.”
There was a hunter watching the bear watching the fish watching the fly. He thought, “if that fly drops six inches, the fish will get the fly, the bear will go for the fish, and I can shoot the bear and have myself a nice meal.”
There was a mouse watching the hunter watching the bear watching the fish watching the fly. He thought, “if that fly drops six inches, the fish will get the fly, the bear will get the fish, the hunter will shoot the bear, drop his sandwich and I can have myself a nice meal.”
There was a cat in a tree watching the mouse watching the hunter watching the bear watching the fish watching the fly. He thought, “if that fly drops six inches, the fish will get the fly, the bear will get the fish, the hunter will shoot the bear, drop his sandwich, the mouse will go for the sandwich, and I can catch that mouse and have myself a nice meal.”
Then it all happened
The fly dropped six inches
The fish came up and caught the fly
The bear came out and caught the fish
The hunter got up to shoot the bear and dropped his sandwich
The mouse went for the sandwich
The cat jumped from the tree, missed, and landed in the pond
The lesson that can be learned here is that every time a fly drops six inches, a pussy gets wet.
Yo mama's so fat, when she skips a meal, the stock market drops.
Your at a buffet, you think your hungry for two, but misfortune happens when you think of your self, you get stuck looking at sides in the buffet, a roly poly gal you see in corner of your eye, eyeballing the main dishes in front at the end, you go in for the pickings, you get intercepted by a far more hungrier matter, but you find yourself getting slamed over the buffet table, and realize you are gasping for air, and she's is tenderizing you for dinner.
My mother wanted to test my responsibility and wanted me to cook dinner for the family to help mean understand how it feels to constantly cook for a whole family. So me with my horrible humor decided to make a giant joke for when dinner time came around and so I just got four plates and set them in front of my family and I then said, "Here you are a fine African meal." then everybody looked at me in disappointment and then I continued to say, "what poor taste?"
Your kid is so annoying, he makes his Happy Meal cry
There are three people on an island. One dies, and the second guy goes to burry them. He comes back with deer meat. The first guy eats it, but second guy refuses the meal.
When the men return to the mainland, they part ways. The first man goes to eat the deer again at a local restaurant. He takes one bite, then jumps off a bridge.
In heaven, an angel asks him why.
“Well you see,” he answered, “that man was a tribal cannibal. Delicious in my wife’s meat though.”
