ME jokes
Roses are red, lemons are sour, spread your legs, give me an hour!
Every time someone calls me fat I get so depressed I cut myself...
A piece of cake.
Chiropractor: Final neck adjustment in 3, 2, 1. How did that feel?
Me: *silence*
What's an orphan's favorite Roblox game?
"Adopt Me."
I saw a kid crying. I asked him what's wrong, where are your parents? They paused and looked at me funny... GOD I LOVE WORKING AT AN ORPHANAGE.
Memes
Tell me a joke about sodium.
Na.
My Dad said he got me from the shops, and I remembered what Grandpa said about him.
People: You're ugly.
Me: Ok.
People: I hate you.
Me: Cool, IDC.
People: You're annoying.
Me: Good for me.
People: BTS is dumb.
Me: I'll give you 5 seconds to run!
What did the adopted poker player say?
"Will you raise me?"
Me: Hey, that's a really heavy bag, do you have a lot of books and magazines in there?
The Quiet Kid: Yeah, magazines.....
One time I was watching TV.
Mom: Omg, your dad is coming!
Me: Omg, really?
Mom: Sike, I lied.
My wife of 60 years told me, "Let's go upstairs and make love."
I just sighed and said, "Choose one, I can't do both."
What is love? Baby, don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me, no more!
What is an orphanage's favorite Roblox game?
"Adopt Me."
Me: Are you an orphan?
Orphan: Yes, what gave me away?
Me: Your parents.
Friend: Hi, orphan.
Orphan: Tell me a yo momma joke.
Friend: ummm
Orphan: Exactly, U can't.
Friend: Yo momma so disappointed she left!
Me: Hey, do you want to meet my grandma?
Friend: Yeah, sure.
Me: *pulls out gun*
I walked past an orphanage, the orphans started to call me names, and I said, "At least I have a family!"
I fell in love with my computer because it helps me Excel.
Mom! Mom! My classmates called me an orphan!