Man jokes
Why did the Invisible Man turn down a job offer? He couldn’t see himself doing it.
God creates dog.
God: "You are man's best friend."
Dog: "That's pretty sexist."
God: "No, man as in- You know what, FUCK IT! You can't speak!"
Dog: "....."
God: "And chocolate kills you!"
Dog: "🐶"
Why do gay men hate periods?
They prefer Collins.
Why did God create women before men?
He didn’t want any advice on how to do it.
I like Christmas.
It’s the holiday where an old man breaks into people’s homes so he can give them toys! :) yaaaaay 😁
Memes
Did you ever see any white men drowning in the Atlantic Ocean?
Yeah, it went on and on.
What did the talking rope say to the man?
"Just hang in there."
Hitler was a good man because, after all, he did kill Hitler.
How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends how hard you throw them.
What's a cannibal's favorite snack?
Men toes! 😂🤣
I told a Chinese man, "Which is better, cats or dogs?"
He said, "Dogs."
I said, "Why?"
He said, "Because dogs tasted better than cats."
Two balls sit inside a bucket. One turned to another and said, "Hey man, boing, are you sentient, too?"
The other one said, "I’m sapient, you are sentient!"
BOINGZINGA!?!
You're so fat, the only thing you could be for Halloween is the Kool-Aid Man.
What is an orphan's favorite movie? Spider-Man: Homecoming.
I asked my dad why a grown man would play Pokémon Go?
He said “Wynaut.”
Man, I had a joke, but it left and never came back.
Do you know why Daddy never comes back to get the milk? Because he’s the milkman.
What happened when the man died? Yes.
Why did the man cut down the tree? Because it was there. 👨🪚🌲
Why didn't the man cut down the tree? Because it wasn't there. 😕🪚!?️
Why did the tree cut down the man? Because it was a bad tree. 🌲🪚😮
Who is older than the Twin Towers?
Billy Bob the 1th. He was older than the Twin Towers. He was born 3 minutes before the Twin Towers and is still alive today.