Man jokes
What's one thing your dad shares with black men? Your sister.
POV them: What's one move to get a man motivated in bed?
Her: All you gotta give is that hawk tuah and spit on that thang, you get me?
Hot man is sexy.
Karien: Mom, I don't care if you're dating a new guy, I want you and Dad to be together!
Daiana: Sometimes things don't work out, like when it didn't work between your father and me. Time to move on, Karien.
Karien: Well I'm not moving on! I can't believe you love someone else!
Daiana: Karien, just give him a chance. His name is Derek, he loves cooking, cleaning, and anything that has you doing something.
Karien: That is so boring!
Daiana: Well just work with me please?
Karien: I'll give you a day... 24 hours, Mom!
A man takes his dog out and steps in shit. He exclaims "WHAT THE DEUCE!"
What did the no head man say?
"Haha!"
A man says, "I'm flying!" He realizes he was pushed out of a plane.
I'm so poor that when people come over to my house, I come out the window and say, "Ding Dong!"
Two cannibals have just captured a man and are about to eat him, so they cook him and lay him on a table. The first cannibal says, "You start at the bottom, I start at the top," so they both chow down.
About half an hour later, the second cannibal says, "I'm having a ball!" Then the first cannibal says, "Then you're eating too fast!"
NSFW Why can't women ever tell men where the clitoris is?
'Cause it's a place to eat.
Time waits for no man, time is obviously a woman.
A German soldier is walking down the street during a hail storm when a lady suddenly falls over after being hit. He, along with a few others, walk over to her. One man asks, "What happened?" and the soldier replies, "Hail hit her."
What do a track meet and a frat house have in common?
They both have something getting ran through by eight men while it just sits there.
I was at school today, and one of my friends said after a test, "Man, that was hard." After that, I started laughing and I said, "That's what she said."
Why did the Invisible Man turn down a job offer? He couldn’t see himself doing it.
A man walks into a bar "Why am I so bad at Limbo?"
Four men were asked if they could have something with their cousin for €500.
The first replied: "For 500€? Of course!"
The second said: "I'd do it for free!"
The third replied: "I would even give her 200€!"
The fourth replied: "With my ex? Never!"
Hey dude, can you spell IHOP?
Sure, man. I. H. O. P.
Wait, you ate my pee!!!
Blondes like their men how they like their rice: brown, 500 at a time, and all in her bowl.
What did the talking rope say to the man?
"Just hang in there."