Catholic priest

Catholic Priest Jokes

A Muslim is about to commit suicide when a Catholic priest stops him "What are you doing?!" Exclaims the priest

"There is nothing on this Earth for me." The Muslim says "I will commit suicide to go to paradise and get 72 virgins!"

The priest shakes his head

"Foolish Muslim, suicide is not the way!" He says

"Follow me, Ill take you to the local primary school."

What's the difference between Woody from Toy Story, and a Catholic priest?

One goes limp when a child walks in the room.

what does a Catholic Priest and a commercial from the 80s have in common they both ask people "WHERES THE MEAT!"

So I saw a bag full children near a dumpster, I guess we know where the Orphans are when the parents didn’t want them..

Wouldn’t want to hope a Catholic Priest comes along, otherwise the Priest will have new sex toys..

How to you trick a catholic priest into using the glory hole at a adult bookstore? tell him it is a confessional booth

Why did the catholic priest suck dick at a glory hole? because someone asked him what would he do for a klondike bar

9

Ten Catholic priests all die in a bus accident. When they arrive at the pearly gates, St. Peter acknowledges them. He sees that they're all priests and immediately says "If any of you are pedophiles, there's no point waiting here. You might as well eff off straight to hell right now!” Nine of the priests turn around and begin to walk away. St. Peter calls after them, "AND TAKE THE DEAF BASTARD WITH YOU TOO!”

6

Police officer pulls over 2 Catholic priests. Says he’s looking for two child molesters.

Catholic priests looking at each other: We’ll do it!

Why is sucking cock inside the confessional booth the only thing that a catholic priest doesn't have to give up for lent ? Because catholic priests don't have to be vegetarians during lent

What is a Italian massage? A Italian catholic priest giving a blowjob inside the confessional booth during lent

A Catholic priest finds a young boy crying at the top of a cliff.

“What’s wrong? Why are you crying?”

The boy points down. “Mummy and Daddy were in the car and it went over the edge”.

The priest can see the flaming wreck below. He looks around and sees no one else is about and starts to unbutton his belt

“It’s really not your day, is it?”

What’s the difference between a Catholic priest and a zit? A zit will wait until you’re twelve before it comes on your face.