Man jokes
Man 1: Hey, I heard you survived a school shooting. What was it like?
Man 2: People were screaming and running everywhere. I was only able to get a few of them.
Blondes like their men how they like their rice: brown, 500 at a time, and all in her bowl.
Breaking news: Man with Alzheimer's forgets he's blind and recovers from visual impairment.
What do you call a white man sandwiched between two black men in a blue sleeping bag?
An Oreo.
My last 15 minutes as a 23 y/o!!
It's not my birthday, but a scary-looking man with a crowbar just broke into my house.
What's the difference between Batman and a Black man???
Batman can go out at night without Robin.
If a man and a woman need a marriage license to get married, does a lesbian couple need a liquor license to get married?
How does Hellen Keller meet men?
She goes on blind dates.
Did you hear about the woman who broke up with the man who had a small penis?
When his friends ask how he’s doing, he said, “I wasn’t that into her.”
Why do men fart louder than women?
Because women can’t keep their mouth shut to build up any pressure.
Four men were asked if they could have something with their cousin for €500.
The first replied: "For 500€? Of course!"
The second said: "I'd do it for free!"
The third replied: "I would even give her 200€!"
The fourth replied: "With my ex? Never!"
What’s strong enough for a man, but made for a woman?
The back of my hand.
What do a gay man and an ambulance have in common?
They both take it in the back and go “whoot whoot.”
Man: *steals drink*
Boy: bro😭😭
Man: Why are u crying over a drink?
Boy: That had drugs.
Man: ....
Genie: You cannot wish for more wishes, immortality, or love.
Man: I wish not to die a virgin.
Genie: I just said no wishing for immortality!
Why is it that skinny men like fat women?
Because they need warmth in winter, and shade in summer.
"Poor old fool," thought the gentleman as he watched an old man fish in a puddle outside a pub. He invited the old man inside for a drink.
The gentleman asked, "So how many have you caught today?"
The old man replied, "You're the eighth."
A man comes home, and the wife says, "My ex just died by getting hit by a bus." And the husband said, "I lost my job as a bus driver."
Did you see that Chinese man with no legs?
No, I'm blind.
Stop ruining my jokes.
Isn't that the Chinese man with no legs' fault?
It's not like He Go Ann Hi Weh.
Cop: "I'm arresting you for downloading the entire Wikipedia."
Man: "Wait! I can explain everything!"