Man Jokes

Two Italian men get on a bus...

They sit down and engage in an animated conversation. They speak with an Italian accent.

The lady sitting behind them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say the following:

"Emma come first.

Den I come.

Den two asses come together.

I come once-a-more.

Two asses, they come together again.

I come again and pee twice.

Then I come one lasta time."

"You foul-mouthed swine," retorted the lady indignantly.

"In this country we don't talk about our sex lives in public!"

"Hey, coola down lady," said the man.

"Who talkin' abouta sexa?

I'm a justa tellin' my frienda how to spella 'Mississippi'."

What does a pizza delivery man and a ginacologist have in common? They can both smell it but they can’t eat it

Someone asked me my gender... I said woah man

Why didnt Logan Paul high five the asain man.....because he loves to leave asains hanging

I heard the man who invented Autocorrect died; may he wrist in peach.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

A man died and went to heaven, everytime you cheat you get a worse car, the first man cheated 5 times he got a jeep, the second man cheat 3 times he got a BMW, the third man never cheated he got a Lamborghini, the second man saw the third man sad he said "why are you sad" the third man said "I saw my wife with a scooter".

Good sex sounds like a white man walking across the street with flip-flops on.

Teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime.

Teach a feminist to fish and she will accuse you of patronising her, claim she knew how to do it anyway and that even if she didn’t, she could easily work it out without the help of a man.

what's the difference between ironman and ironwoman? one is a superhero and the other is a simple command.

What's the difference between a good TV show and a gay man?

One makes your day and one make your whole week.

What kind of man would be a lesbians best friend? A decimen.

I asked a kid at my work where his parents were. He started crying. Man, I don't know what I did. I'll ask another kid at the orphanage.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

when you forget the pinata at the birthday party. kids: Aww man. but the emo kid just hung himself. kids:Yaaaaayyy. Parents: Adjust, improvise, overcome, that is the way

A homeless man sits in front of a home Depot, a man walking out of the store hands him some money and asks "Why are you in front of the home Depot?" And the man says "Isn't it obvious? Hoping somebody accidentally drops the house they just bought."