Mammal jokes
How does a donkey open a door?
With a don-key.
A panda goes to see a hooker. He goes down on her, he mates with her, he ejaculates and then he attempts to walk away.
The working girl asks, "Aren't you going to pay me?"
She opens the dictionary to "Prostitute: One who sells sexual companionship for money."
The panda picks up the dictionary and turns to the definition "Panda: A marsupial who eats, roots, shoots, and leaves."
A penguin and a polar bear are sitting in a bathtub. The penguin asks the polar bear, "Hey, can you pass the soap?" The polar bear obliges.
A few moments later, the penguin asks, "Hey, can you pass the scrubber?" The polar bear does. Shortly after that, the penguin says, "Hey, can you pass the rubber ducky?"
The polar bear, beginning to become upset, turns to the penguin and says, "What do you think I am? A radio?!"
What kind of bees produce milk?
Boobies.
What’s another name for a cow?
You... cause you're fat.
Which category is glory in?
Cats.
What is a dog?
An animal.
Q: If a cat says to a dog, "All dogs are liars," and the dog says to the cat, "All cats are liars," what does it mean?
A: It means cats and dogs can talk.
What's the difference between your mom and a fat female cow...
A female cow doesn't have a dick.
Where do you mix a bunny and a hare?
Bunny hair.
Why did the zebra cross the road?
What do you call a bear with no ears? A b.
Yeah, that joke was unbearable.
Two rabbits were racing. Neither could get ahead, so they ended in a hare-tie!
What's the difference between a redhead and an orangutan?
Some people adopt orangutans.
Knock knock? Who's there? Kanga. Kanga who? Not kangawho, kangaroo!
What did the bull tell his son before it went for college?
Bye-son.
Kid: Why aren’t koalas considered bears?
Nerd: Because they're marsupials.
Kid: No, because they didn’t have the koala-fication!
What is the difference between a horse and a rabbit?
A horse can't hoop.
When it comes to bears, of course they always give bear hugs, well what do you call them when they aren't hugging right?
Just barely hugging you! Lol.
Beach whales.