Mammal jokes
One day a rooster fell into a swimming pool and a cat laughed. And the moral of the story? A wet cock can always satisfy a pussy.
What does a bear beat off with?
His bear hands.
What is a monkey's favorite game? A Hangman!
What's big, black, and touches children?
Harambe.
I have no dad, no milk, and no mom, so that means no tits, like if you can relate.
Memes
Seal Vs Sea Lion
I'm a cheetah, I cheat, duh?
Why did the bat cross the road? Because to get to the blood bar.
What do you call a one-legged hippo?
A hoppo!
What do you get if you cross a zebra and a donkey?
Zeedonk.
Why didn't the bear leave home?
He could not bear leaving his family.
What's the difference between a seal and a special kid?
They both go: "Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh!"
What is monkey's favorite position? Donkey Kong.
Why do cheetahs have spots?
Chickenpox!
Why can't cheetahs play any games?
Because they're cheetahs!
Two female mice met and one spoke:
"Yesterday I met a mouse. He was black, and he had wings, and he had some cool, sharp teeth. He said he only ate at night."
Other mouse: "Umm... that's a bat."
"That asshole! He told me that he is a pilot!"
Why do animals have playing cards with foxes?
Because they’re a bunch of cheetahs!
Why can’t you play games with cats? Because they always ‘cheetah’.
What kind of bear has no teeth?
A gummy bear.
What do you call a bunch of llamas?
Alpaca llama.
What did the Cheetah say to the Lion?
"I'm a Cheetah!"