Mammal jokes
Why was the elephant woozy?
Because he was trunk.
What do you call a squirrel with wings? A flying squirrel, it's pretty self-explanatory.
I named my horse Mayo. Mayo neighs.
A seal walks into a club.
What is the difference between your girlfriend and a walrus?
One is hairy and smells like fish, and the other is a walrus. You're welcome.
What is monkey's favorite position? Donkey Kong.
What did the whale say?
Nothing!
It just wailed.
What animal lies? A lion.
I have no dad, no milk, and no mom, so that means no tits, like if you can relate.
What do you call a bear without an ear?
B.
Why didn't the bear leave home?
He could not bear leaving his family.
Explain Bear weighs 1 ton.
What did one male whale say to the other male whale?
"She's gonna blow!"
I was sitting in a bar one day and two really large women came in, talking in an interesting accent. So I said, "Cool accent, are you two ladies from Ireland?" One of them snarled at me, "It's Wales, Dumbo!" So I corrected myself, "My apologies, so are you two whales from Ireland?"
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house?
Of course, houses can't jump.
Why isn't a koala a bear? It doesn't have the koalafications.
Why is the koala not a bear?
It doesn't have the right koalafications.
Why can't cheetahs play any games?
Because they're cheetahs!
Q: What type of mother gives their daughter sperm? A: A furry mother.
What is a cow on two legs?
Yo mama!