Make a jokes

I was going to make a pun about math, but my answers never add up.

The Make-A-Wish Foundation has gone too far. All of the Make-A-Wish kids asked for cancer to be gone, so they just gave the cancer to all of the Make-A-Wish kids.

I was going to make a chemistry joke. But it looks like I won’t get a reaction :)

I asked my mom to make me a brat. She was sleepy but I said do it anyway. My mom and my dad had fucked last night so he was on the couch but naked. She took a knife and sliced his dick, then put it on a bun, then ketchup and mustard. I said this tasted funny. She was snoring, then I threw it and said, "EW IS THIS A DICK WHAT THE FUCK AHHH!!!!?!?!!!!"

Ever since that day, they haven't fucked again because he ain't got nun to fuck with.

Three guys landed on a cannibal island. The cannibal chef told them if they wanted to live, they had to go get 10 of one fruit and bring it to him, and he would tell them what to do.

So the first guy brings 10 apples, and the chef said if he could shove all 10 of those in his ass without making a sound, he could live. He was three apples in and made a sound, and they ate him. The second guy brought grapes; nine grapes in, and he burst out laughing. The cannibals ate him. Then the first guy said, "Why'd you laugh? You were almost there!" The other guy who had the grapes said, "I couldn't help it, I was told the third guy came back with 10 pineapples."

I'd make a farming joke, but I'm just a little less than corny enough.

What is 6" long, bright red, and your wife cries when you feed it to her?

Her miscarriage.

A horse, a fox, and a bunny join together and make a rock band. They started doing tiny gigs, but they got famous and went on tour. They all got so famous it went to their heads, and the band disbanded. The fox made his, and the bunny made her own. The horse was sad that the band was no more, so he went to a bar, and the bartender asked why the long face?

How do you make a plumber cry?

You kill his family.

Hogwarts is making a new condom. It's called "fetus deletus."

I would make a Paul Walker joke, but it would crash and burn.

I wanted to make a joke about homework, but sadly, I'm an orphan.

My daughter said I could never make a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen the look on her face when I drove pasta!

How do you make a fruit punch?

You give it a pair of boxing gloves.

A Make-A-Wish patient wanted to see Black Panther IRL, so I pulled his plug.

How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it.

Why aren’t Make-A-Wish kids allowed to fly?

Because they rarely make it out of the terminal.

Why did God steal a rib from Adam and make a woman out of it?

God wanted to show that nothing sensible can come of stealing!

One day I came to my mom and said, "MOM!!! I can make a butterfly!"

Mom: "No you can't..."

Me: *throws butter out the window* Me: "Look I made a butterfly!"

lol this isn't funny but I hope you liked it.

I would make a joke about 9/11, but it has a tendency to crash and burn.