Made jokes
I was in an audition for the lead role of movie "Aquaman." The Director told me to dive into a pool. Then outta nowhere Penaldo showed up and made a big dive into the pool. The director was impressed and selected Penaldo for the movie.
Shame on you Penaldo for destroying my dream!
What did God say when he made the Black human? Oh no, I burnt another one!
Wanna touch my shirt? It's made of boyfriend/girlfriend/partner material.
What is white, blue eyed, blonde haired and somehow was made in Galilee during the Roman occupation?
An Italian Renaissance painting that was carbon dated.
True story: In 1986, in the midst of the HIV epidemic, they made condoms available to the public. At that time, me and my boyfriend were 13 years old. My boyfriend was so happy: "These will make great water balloons!" And I was even happier. I did not have to pack a lunch for school tomorrow, lol.
I made someone a PB and J sandwich... they died.
My teacher made us watch a movie about the struggles of being an overweight person in this day and age.
It was really heavy on me.
Son: Mom, can I borrow $50?
Mom: What? NO WAY! Do you think money grows on trees?
Son: Mom, what is money made of?
Mom: Paper.
Son: Where does paper come from?
Mom: . . .
The companies that made the hand gel sanitizer must be absolutely rubbing their hands together!
I made an advent calendar for a Jehovah’s Witness.
Behind every door someone tells you to fuck off.
As a kid, I was made to walk the plank.
Because we couldn't afford a dog.
Yo mama so stupid, she made an appointment with Dr. Pepper.
They finally made a movie about a clock, about time.
Caesar went to the future only to see how the Romans forgot Julius Caesar but only made a salad... I think it would have been better if Caesar stayed dead.
You were sad because your grandmother died.
The next day, you were washing your face, and you realize sadness made your face BLUE.
My sister keeps cursing... so I made fun of her... "fuk fuk fuk fuk fuk fuk fuk fuk", fowl language is for chickens!
A blind man had an argument with a man in a wheelchair. The man in a wheelchair made fun of him saying, "look, there's a spider." The blind man simply said, "Step on it."
Michael Jackson and Kelly Clarkson both did shady stuff to children. Michael Jackson said that there is nothing wrong with sharing a bed with unrelated small children. Kelly Clarkson said that there is nothing wrong with physically beating a small child.
The thing is, though, only one of them made "Billie Jean" or "Beat It", and the other is just a typical karaoke country singer. So no surprise people gave Wacko Jacko a pass.
Where were the first French Fries 🍟 made?
In Greece.
You're so fat you're the reason they made tread "meals".
You're so ugly we can't have neighbors.