Waking Up Next to a Dead Baby

Alright, listen up, buttercup. So, you got this dead baby next to you, right? Already bad. But what if you were so plastered the night before that you didn't just sleep next to it, you, uh, 'made love' to it? Yeah, it's messed up. It's like finding out your toast fell butter-side down, but the toast is a baby and the butter is your dignity. Fact: you probably smell like feet.