Lot Jokes

A man who drinks a lot is told by his that if he ever gets drunk again she will leave him. Later the man goes to a pub and drinks a lot and throws up all down his jacket. 'Oh no.' He says to his friend' if I go home like this again, my wife will leave me.' 'Dont worry' his friend says. 'Put a £20 note in your jacket pocket. When your wife challenges you, produce the money and say another man threw up on you and gave you the £20 note for the dry cleaning.' 'Brilliant!' the man says and goes home. He walks through his front door and his wife sees him. She is furious. 'No no' the man says producing the money from his inside pocket. 'A man threw up on me and gave me £20 for the dry cleaning.' 'Whats the other £20 note for?' asks his wife. 'Ah, that's from the man who shat in my pants.....'

Penaldo song 🎵🎵🎵

He has conquered all the Farmers He is never going to stop From Lithuania down to Andorra He has scored a fucking lot Penalties and Tapins The Fields of Faroe Islands He is our GOAT And his name is Cristiano Columbus Allez, Allez, Allez Allez, Allez, Allez

I done a thing were we have chat hangouts with people that like gwen or just want to hang out do stuff.

All people are in vited

we have alot! Enjoy

I went on a dating site looking for arsonists

I found a lot of matches

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

It's called Costa Coffee because it's short for "Cost A lot for boiled, rancid dishwater".

Waiter: "here you go, one medium-rare steak".

Me: "I like it well done."

Waiter: "thanks, that means a lot."

Thanks for explaining the word many to me.It means a lot.

Me: Hey thats a really heavy bag, do you have a lot of books and magazines in there? The Quiet Kid: Yeah, Magazines.....

Knowing how to pick locks has really opened a lot of doors for me

people dream about having a lot of money of money but the only thing you should be dream about is a hairline

What do your girlfriend and a pool have in common? They both cost a lot of money for the amount of time you’re inside them.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

School is a lot like boot camp, the only difference is that you don't have to get deployed to get shot at

Papyrus:You are so lazy sans! Sans:Call me what you want.I got THICK SKIN! Pap:Another bad joke and I'm finished with him!! Frisk:HAHAHA Pap:we are monsters.The awfulest kind! Sans:to mess with us takes a lot of SPINE!!!