Like jokes
"Do you have a noose?"
"Nose?"
"Yeah, noose- nose... I heard yours was stuffed lately--haha."
"I actually smell something--like a corpse. Is it you?"
"No."
*Dying on the inside has never been so detectable.*
How does a hillbilly mother know when her daughter is on her period? Her son’s dick tastes like blood.
Tell me a joke about my hairline.
No, because he don't got one, feel like Donald Trump, it don't move.
How do you paint a wall red? Throw a baby at it!
What do you call an orphan who likes football?
Because someone will actually give him something.
The mom and dad left the child because they were famous and rich, like rich monkeys.
Your hairline looks like it was drawn onto your head.
Did you know penguins can fly if you throw them hard enough? Just like children!
Your hairline legit looks like the Himalayan mountain range, except you need binoculars to find it.
Your hairline has a huge path between it, looks like Moses had something to do with it.
What do you say when a handicapped man forgets something? "He knew it like the back of his hand."
One time, a man got mad at me because I was hitting on his girlfriend. Like come on, man, it was only a couple of bruises!
You are like a thunderstorm; when you go away, like your dad, everyone is happy.
Kid at Wish: I wish I could be Batman.
Doctor: Okay, shoots mum and dad. Doctor: I guess now you’ll have to be gay, you wanted to be like Batman.
Do you know what Fortnite was like before season 2 chapter 3? They put the Foundation / The Rock in the water where aliens were that season.
Yo mamma so fat that she like that ocean, we haven't even explored 5% of her yet.
You’re looking pretty rough this evening. You look like if sweatpants were a person.
Guy: Are you tired?
His “Crush”: No.
Guy: Are you sure, because you’ve been running through my mind all day?
His “Crush”: That’s sweet.
Guy: I’m joking, you don’t look like you do any running.
Why do terrorists like the Twin Towers?
It's the next thing they blow up.
Women be like I don't wear makeup for men.
Then get mad when a man doesn't compliment her in her makeup!