Like jokes
Your forehead is built like the Indian flag.
Dark humor is like food. Not everyone gets it.
Your nana gay, just like you, and you're made of atoms, nerd.
What do you call an emo that cuts too deep? Gushers.
The old cookoo master on the top of Mt. Qinshan told me this when I was eating sushi:
"The first bite tastes like heaven, the second takes you there."
😳
Why do orphans like fucking other dads?
Because they get to have a daddy.
By day I like girls, by night I like boys, but you, I wouldn’t like you at dusk or dawn.
Good Evening Twitter, this is your boy EatDatPussy445, and about like 30-45 minutes ago, I beat the f*** out of my dick so god damn hard that I can't even feel my left leg, my left leg has went totally numb. And, my dick has also went totally numb, to the point where it feels f***ing weird when I go and take a piss.
Question:
Did you hear the one about MAGA people?
Answer:
It "sucks" just like they do!
How are Black people like communism?
Because they’ll never work, but some of them are willing to give it a shot.
A man walks into a bar and orders three shots. "Long day?" the bartender asks. "Well... My oldest son just came out..." The man finishes the shots and leaves the bar. The next day, the man comes back and orders four shots. "What now?" the bartender asks. "My middle son just came out." The man finishes his drinks and leaves. He comes back the next day and orders five shots. "Again?" the bartender asks. "Yeah. My youngest son." He drinks his shots and leaves. The next day, he comes in again. This time, he orders ten shots. "My God! Is there anyone in your family that likes girls??" the bartender asks. "Yeah... My wife."
Alright, I'm gonna drink the lo-carb one to see how it compares to the normal Monster.
Holy shit, it tastes just like the original one.
There's like a weird after taste though.
Kinda like a sparkling water one.
I love Monster. I've drank about 5 cans already.
Make this the most liked post.
These jokes are weak like the structure of the towers.
Corona be like:
Eliminating half the population of boomers faster than Thanos.
*snap*
Jesus shows up and says you’ve got to go to church.
You follow him in, and under their breath, it sounds like somebody says, "You steal." You say in your mind, knowing you have before, "I’m sorry." Then somebody coughs, and under their breath, it sounds like they say again, "You steal," so you whisper quietly, "I’m sorry."
...then somebody in German says, "Schieß den Hurensohn!"
The last number of your like is the Amogus you get.
1: Amogus trollface
2: Frogus
3: Amogus in 2013
4: Chogus
5: Classic Amogus
6: Wait this isn't Amogus
7: Amogus drip
8: Amog sus
9: Amog stuff
*walks into sex shop*
Hello. I would like to buy 1 sex, please.
Why does your grandma like gardening so much?
Because she loves getting dirty down on her knees.
Why are women like hurricanes?
They come in nasty and wet, then leave with your house and car.