Like jokes
Children are like pills.
The smaller they are, the easier they are to take.
Germans be like, “Guten Morgan.”
Bitch, that's not my name.
Your mum is like a Golden Knight. She will still attack my tower with troops in the way, like Jude Porter.
When your girlfriend picks you up and decides to prank you by not wearing pants to a seafood restaurant:
Did you get seafood without me? It smells like fish.
You're like a stormy cloud, because once you go away, it's a nice day.
Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered, "Y?"
Your forehead and hairline are like friends; they go way back.
I asked my sister to say something.
She said, "No."
That's what I like to hear.
Your hairline is like a lollipop because every time someone licks it, it gets shorter.
Egg shaped, dome, bowling ball lookin' ass, bald fuck with that 360 degrees ahh head, motherfucker look like a damn balloon.
Call me Kobe 'cause I'm finna use your head as a basketball and throw it at yo' parents. Mr. Clean, bootleg Saitama lookin' ass mfer. No hair? :(
I hate when people leave their cars running, especially in the summer.
I'm like, "You got Tracy Latimer in there or something?"
What's it like to have the best daughter in the world? You'll have to ask grandma!
Joe Biden would’ve died in the Secret Service tackle. They would have been like, "Get down Mr. Presi-"
You're so much like a marshmallow, you're so squishy and sticky, and everyone puts their sticks inside of you.
I like my coffee black. Just like my soul.
Yo life got no meaning, just like your dad when he left. Like if it's a good one.
What do you say to a black midget?
Wanna a shower? You look like you got splashed by a muddy puddle.
What do cheetahs like?
Sports!
Meow meow, I'm a cow and I like cum cum cum.
Daughter: Hey Dad, can I use your car?
Dad: Sure, but first you have to give me a blow job."
Daughter: Okay, (proceeds to service dad). Dad, ewww, your dick tastes like shite!"
Dad: Oh, that's right, I lent your brother the car.