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Shorty

  • Oooh, I fall apart. Oooh, yeah, mmhmm. She told me that I'm not enough, yeah, And she left me with a broken heart, yeah. She fooled me twice and it's all my fault, yeah. She cut too deep, now she left me scarred, yeah. Now there's too many thoughts goin' through my brain, yeah, And now I'm takin' these shots like it's Novocaine, yeah. Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, didn't know it before Surprised when you caught me off guard All this damn jewelry I bought You was my shorty, I thought Never caught a feelin' this hard Harder than the liquor I pour Tell me you don't want me no more But I can't let go Everybody told me so Feelin' like I sold my soul Devil in the form of a whore Devil in the form of a whore You said it No, you said it No, you said it We'd be together Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, didn't know it before Surprised when you caught me off guard All this damn jewelry I bought You was my shorty, I thought Ice keep pourin' and the drink keep flowin' Try to brush it off but it keep on goin' Covered in scars and I can't help showin' Whippin' in the foreign and the tears keep blowin' Ice keep droppin' and the drink keep flowin' Try to brush it off but it keep on goin' All these scars, can't help from showin' Whippin' in the foreign and the tears keep blowin', yeah Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, didn't know it before Surprised when you caught me off guard All this damn jewelry I bought You was my shorty, I thought.

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  • Ice Cream

  • POV: when your friend scares you, and you acidently throw it in the air and it falls and drops on your head, and you turn and look at your friend that it was there fault like bro it's not that deep fr

    A stylized cartoon block-headed character with axolotl-like fins looking stunned with broken ice cream cones and melting ice cream dripping all over its head and face.
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  • Face

  • Jaylie 😠: I don't care, what he said was so out of line!

    Harvey 😁: It's funny!

    Jaylie😠 : He said "Stupid, silly bitch face I raised! I should have known!" That's not funny, Harv!

    Harvey 🙁: Come on Jay. Give Chris a chance?

    Jaylie 🙄: Sorry but I'm a stupid, silly bitch face he raised. He should have known!

    Harvey😟: That's not true!

    Jaylie 😣: He even made fun of Kalierien. She is so sensitive!

    Harvey 😡: SHUSH!!!!

    Kalierien😡: Hi guys, how's your day?

    Harvey😁: Good!

    Jaylie 🤬: Mine was like living in hell!

    Kalierien: 🤬SAME!!!!!

    Stephen Hawking

  • I think the Explanation Bear reminds me of Stephen Hawking. Because they're both part machine, and nobody likes them explaining everything.

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  • Friend

  • Friend: How dark is your humor?

    Me: .....it...

    Friend: No

    Me: *smiles* GETS BEAT BY THE MISTRESS AND GETS SCOLDED BY THE MASTER!!!

    Friend: Why are you like this?

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  • Cowboy

  • Why did the cowboy put his bunk in the fireplace?

    'Cause he wanted to sleep like a log!

  • 2
  • Orphan

  • Why do the orphans keep going back to the orphan home?

    Because they got no home to go to, yeah, please like this and laugh because I got no one to read this.

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  • Whore

  • I'm Alya. I'm a dumb whore who ruins people's fun on this sight made for jokes with categories for orphan jokes, but I like ruining people's fun.

    Suicide

  • Suicide is just freedom, life is just full of pain... Sometimes if you're gone maybe somebody might notice. Feels like life is a maze and the only way to leave is the exit. Nobody notices your pain, your suffering, and that you try your best though everyone notices your mistakes. Life just feels like everyone hates you. Life for me is just faking smiles, I'm not sure how everyone lives such a good life.

  • 4
  • Bi

  • Frenid: R u gay?

    Me: Yes u

    Frenid: No I am bi.

    Me: Dang it!

    Frenid: What?

    Me: I like u.

    Frenid: Ok I like u to.

  • 2
  • Weed

  • Peaches-REMAKE-By-Justin Beiber and watersharky Music Productions-

    I got my peaches out in Georgia (oh, yeah, shit)

    I get my weed from California (that's that shit)

    I took my chick up to the North, yeah (badass bitch)

    I get my light right from the source, yeah (yeah, that's it)

    And I see you (oh), the way I breathe you in (in), it's the texture of your skin

    I wanna wrap my arms around you, baby, never let you go, oh

    And I say, oh, there's nothing like your touch

    It's the way you lift me up, yeah

    And I'll be right here with you 'til the end

    I got my peaches out in Georgia (oh, yeah, shit)

    I get my weed from California (that's that shit)

    I took my chick up to the North, yeah (badass bitch)

    I get my light right from the source, yeah (yeah, that's it)

    You ain't sure yet, but I'm for ya

    All I could want, all I can wish for

    Nights alone that we miss more

    And days we save as souvenirs

    There's no time, I wanna make more time

    And give you my whole life

    I left my girl, I'm in Mallorca

    Hate to leave her, call it torture

    Remember when I couldn't hold her

    Left her baggage for Rimowa

    I got my peaches out in Georgia (oh, yeah, shit)

    I get my weed from California (that's that shit)

    I took my chick up to the North, yeah (badass bitch)

    I get my light right from the source, yeah (yeah, that's it)

    I get the feeling, so I'm sure (sure)

    Hand in my hand because I'm yours

    I can't, I can't pretend, I can't ignore you're right for me

    Don't think you wanna know just where I've been, oh

    Done being distracted

    The one I need is right in my arms (oh)

    Your kisses taste the sweetest with mine

    And I'll be right here with you 'til end of time

    I got my peaches out in Georgia (oh, yeah, shit)

    I get my weed from California (that's that shit)

    I took my chick up to the North, yeah (badass bitch)

    I get my light right from the source, yeah (yeah, that's it)

    I got my peaches out in Georgia (oh, yeah, shit)

    I get my weed from California (that's that shit)

    I took my chick up to the North, yeah (badass bitch)

    (I get my light right from the source, yeah, yeah)

    I got my peaches out in Georgia (oh, yeah, shit)

    I get my weed from California (that's that shit)

    I took my chick up to the North, yeah (badass bitch)

    I get my light right from the source, yeah (yeah, that's it)

    I got my peaches out in Georgia (oh, yeah, shit)

    I get my weed from California (that's that shit)

    I took my chick up to the North, yeah (badass bitch)

    I get my light right from the source, yeah (yeah, that's it).

    Potato

  • A kid has an older brother that’s a very popular lifeguard. He sees all of the people that talk to his brother, but he’s fairly ignored. So one day he asks his brother why everyone likes him so much. His older brother says, “Well, all you gotta do is stick a potato in your pocket.” So the next day the boy goes back to the pool and he has a potato in his pocket, but everyone is avoiding him even more now. At the end of the day he goes up to his brother and asks why it didn’t work, and his brother says, “Dumbass, you were supposed to put it in the front!”

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  • Orphan

  • Why was the orphan walking through the neighborhood? I don't know, either. It's not like he has a home to go to.

  • 0