Life

Life jokes

Science class

In my science class we were watching a video, and for no reason at all, it started talking about Black Lives Matter, and my friend leaned over and whispered, “White lives matter more!”

Grass

What’s the difference between me and grass? Grass doesn’t cut itself.

Wife

My wife got mad at me because I took our life savings and brought golden retrievers.

Like, bitch, we can get gold because of these golden retrievers.

Memes

Orphan

How is sports like regular life for orphans?

They don't get picked for either.

Emo

What hit the floor first, the emo or the apple? The apple, the rope stopped the emo.

Dad

When I was born, I saw you at the adoption center alone.

That day your dad got milk. 😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬

World

What's the most annoying thing in the world?

When you're told you're still qualified to live.

Orphan

Why can an orphan relate to a pack of bananas?

Because they both split away from their family.

Love

Dear Kenya, love of life,

Thanks for commenting on my jokes, and thanks for being a nice person to me! Love, Jaden. You can tell by the emojis 🥰😍❤️💞!

Love you a million times more!

Insult

Jorden Calerendiá.

I bet you are a child molester who got out of jail and is now sexually harassing kids such as Addison! Will fuck off and get a life, by the way your roasts are not fucking funny they are bullshit like your face and your hairline.

Philosophy

Don't hate life, love it because when you want to live and try again in life, it's already too late. :(