Why can't you fool an aborted baby?
Because it wasn't born yesterday.
Life Jokes
My life.
"Hi, my name is Robert. I have no life. Even my PS4 username is gay lil_bama."
I wanted some breakfast, so I grabbed some Life cereal.
I poured it, but lemons came out. So I said, "Well, when life gives you lemons!"
I help suicidal people.
BTW verb not adjective.
Little Johnny died.
Random person: Minecraft is actually more peaceful than real life.
Me: Well, screw life. Maybe if I light a fire on myself, I will go to Minecraft (my excuse for suicide).
If I could be any creature, I would be a Unicorn because they are Beautiful, Majestic, Sparkly, Bright, Gods. They create Joy and Happiness everywhere they go.
Unicorns made my life better when I got to know them more. ^-^ They filled my life with more Happiness. I believe in the Unicorns, and they'll believe in me. I am not a Unicorn, although I am the Princess of the Unicorn Land, but if I could be any creature, I would be a Unicorn! :P
Why are apples and orphans the same?
They always get picked on.
Why are orphans so bad at football?
In my science class we were watching a video, and for no reason at all, it started talking about Black Lives Matter, and my friend leaned over and whispered, “White lives matter more!”
What’s the difference between me and grass? Grass doesn’t cut itself.
Why can’t a tree have sex? They are always tied up.
My wife got mad at me because I took our life savings and brought golden retrievers.
Like, bitch, we can get gold because of these golden retrievers.
How is sports like regular life for orphans?
They don't get picked for either.
What hit the floor first, the emo or the apple? The apple, the rope stopped the emo.
Why are most school shooters mostly white?
Because Black lives MATTER.
When I was born, I saw you at the adoption center alone.
That day your dad got milk. 😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬
Why don't orphans have Life360?
Because parents won't track them.
What's the most annoying thing in the world?
When you're told you're still qualified to live.
