Law jokes
It's impossible to rape a rapeist because rapeists want sex.
Why didn't Donald Trump pick up his phone when Jeffrey Epstein called him?
Because Donald killed Jeffrey Epstein in prison to hide the evidence.
How to get rich:
Step 1: Tell an orphan he will get a family.
Step 2: Knock out the orphan.
Step 3: Cut open the orphan.
Step 4: Well there [are] organs.
Step 5: Do it again.
And nobody will call the cops 'cause they got no family.
What was a pedophile's hardest thing? Fitting in!
Mary had a lamb. Her fleece was black as coal. When I tried to touch it that night, next day I went to court.
What is harder than steel?
Michael Jackson in a playground.
What do you call an ass that’s a DETECTIVE?
An undercover pooper.
Why don't rappers ever become bankers?
Because they always break the BARS!
My father told me to always carry a women's bag, but I don't know why he called the cops on me when I helped Mom's bag when we went parachuting. :(
What's the best thing about a prostitute dying on you during sex?
The second hour is free.
A kid asks Trump:
Kid: "Where are the confidential files?"
Trump: "There they are, bud!"
Why did the rapper go to school?
To improve his rap sheet!
Why did the DJ go to jail?
Because he dropped the bass too hard!
What’s worse than banging your sister?
Having to wear your dad’s wedding ring.
What's the difference between child abuse and abandonment?
The abused ones are forced to listen while being abused, while abandoned kids cry because they don't have parents anymore.
What do you get when you cross a corrupt lawyer with a crooked politician?
Chelsea Clinton.
I just prevented a 10-year-old from getting assaulted.
Nothing much, I just decided to go home.
What is the difference between human rights and the rights of a human being in?
You were born on the freeway, you know why?
Because that's where a lot of accidents happen. 😈
Solicitors are more likely to harass someone with a “no soliciting” sign on their front porch.