Law jokes

What’s black and blue and doesn’t like to have sex?

A rape victim!

It's okay, you had socks on :)

You'd think the Catholic Church would be in favor of condoms... less DNA evidence.

What do you call a virgin kid locked in a room with a pedophile? Past tense.

Once a naked woman robs a bank, but sadly, no one can remember her face...

What did Santa Claus get Paris Hilton for Christmas?

He raped her.

I tried to pull (his/her) leg at the comedy club, but got arrested for sexual harassment. Does that still count as a joke? 🤣

What is George Floyd's pickup line?

You are breathtaking.

I would slap you, but that would be animal abuse.

There was a blind man in WWE, and the commentator said, "Watch out! Watch... Oh, he can’t see." After he was sued for national offense.

What’s the best part of violently raping a sexy 10-year-old girl? Killing the little bitch afterwards.

What to gift a child molester who already has everything? A bigger county with more believers.

Which president has never gone to jail?

Lincoln because he's innocent in a cent, get it?

When is a rape victim right?

When she admits she lied.

When a woman decides to abort, it is called a decision, but when I run my truck into a playground of kids, it is called murder.

What do you call anal rape?

Ass cream.

One day a couple was walking when the man stepped on something hard and squishy, then they heard a sound from the bushes. Instead of looking down, they both ran.

Two years later, they turned on the TV to find Ted Bundy on trial. They asked him if he has ever been caught. He said, "No, but a couple was walking as soon as I killed a girl. I jumped into a bush. They didn't know I was there, but the man stepped on the dead body but didn't look down, then he and his girlfriend ran."

Are you suicidal? Remember, if you ever feel unwanted, just check to see your warrants.

I never touched kids, just women, but since I was famous, they were fine with it.

What is the difference between an orphan and a robber?

One is wanted.