Law jokes
what do you call an autistic police officer? special forces
I may not be as "rich" as Donald Trump, but at least I am still allowed to go on holiday to Bali, Niagara Falls, Hong Kong, and the Pyramids of Giza.
Orange Jesus can't travel to these places because these places cannot grant entry to felons.
...ah, who am I kidding? It's likely that Trump is going to prison, anyway.
Where do rape victims buy their clothes from?
The kids section.
At the age of 100, you get a letter from the Queen. At 12, you get a DM from Prince Charles.
My dad has the heart of a lion, and a lifetime ban from the zoo.
Memes
What's the difference between a yellow line and a baby?
You can't run over a yellow line.
You're so ugly, when your mom dropped you off at school, she got a fine for littering.
Are you George Floyd?
'Cause baby, you take my breath away... OOF!
What's the number 1 cause of pedophilia?
Sexy kids.
Oh, sh**! I'm late for my interview! Do you know where the nearest sex offender registry is?
EatDatPussy445, aka Deyione Scott-Wilson Eason, aka Bryant Turman Emerson Moreland, is a pedophile, and he is in Las Vegas right now. Go, go, go, catch him!
What's black and white and red all over?
A police brutality case.
How can you make a woman scream your name when you have sex with her?
Change your name to "Rape."
"Yes, officer! It was a requirement to run over that child. It matched perfectly with the beat drop!"
What’s the difference between a child and someone who has been kidnapped?
One of them is a domesticated pet.
Did you hear about the two thieves who stole a calendar? They each got six months.
If you’re bored, go punch an orphan. What are the parents gonna do?
Why did the orphan play GTA? So he could get wanted.
Why does the orphan do robberies?
Because he wants to be wanted.
What is one good thing about pedophiles?
They drive slow in the school zone.