Grandma: You guy's generation is on too much technology.
Kid: Well, you're the ones that raised us.
Other family members: ...
Kid Jokes
Why do most clips for automatic weapons have 32 bullets?
That's usually how many kids are in a classroom.
What do high school kids and Dow have in common? They both test chemicals.
Why couldn’t the kid play baseball? Because he couldn’t find home.
On the first day of school, the teacher asked a student, "What are your parent's names?"
The student replied, "My father's name is Laughing and my mother's name is Smiling."
The teacher said, "Are you kidding?"
The student said, "No, Kidding is my brother, I am Joking."
Every kid in a classroom is relevant, because if one of them gets shot, they will all be featured on the news.
Why did the kid cross the playground? To get to the other slide!
"Knock, knock.""Who's there?""Kid.""Kid who?""Kidnap you!"
Edward Scissorhands: Why is it that every time I touch someone, they get offended?
Kids: Because you're a psycho path.
When the school shooter enters the classroom and it's the quiet kid's dad.
Kids when they meet a kid out of home alone be like: “At least your mom came back!”
What is an animal that kids get for Christmas and can easily give to someone else?
A white elephant.
A kid is trick-or-treating. He knocks on a door. Then someone opens the door and the kid said, "HI, I'M THE WICKED WIENER!"
Why do emo kids cost so much?
Because they’re the only people you can scan at the checkout machine.
Why aren’t Make-A-Wish kids allowed to fly?
Because they rarely make it out of the terminal.
I gave a blind kid a hand grenade and told him it's a beyblade.
Kid: What is an orphan's favorite breakfast?
Teacher: What?
Kid: Fruity Pebbles with water.
Teacher: Why water?
Kid: 'Cause his dad never came back with the milk.
What did John Cena say to the blind kid? "You can't see me."
Yo mama is so fat, when she wore yellow, the kids thought they missed the bus.
I saw a depressed kid and I gave him a lamp to lighten up his day.
