Kid jokes
There was a little kid crying in the park today. I asked him where his parents were. Now I realize, man, I love my job.
What did the blind kid get for his birthday?
I don't know, he still didn't look.
I was walking till I saw a kid sitting on the street. I walked over there and said, "Where are your parents?" He cried even more.
Oh, I just love talking to orphans.
"911, what’s your emergency?" I asked, listening to the quiet sobs of a little kid on the other end of the line.
“I think my daddy want to kill me,” the girl said and cried, making me freeze on the spot as I recognized my daughter’s voice.
Walk up to the quiet kid and tell him to hang in there. Trust me, you won’t regret it.
What's got 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet? The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves! Nah, just kidding... He still hasn't unwrapped his present.
A kid asks his dad why his name is Experience. The dad says, "That's what we give our mistakes."
What's the worst thing that can happen to schools?
Quiet kids.
What did the momma grape say to the pappa grape?
"Raisin' our kids is usually pretty fun, but sometimes they get sunburn and I have to take them to the doctor for dry skin."
What flowers are on your face?
What is the real reason why men jack off? They just enjoy killing kids.
What game do emo kids love the most?
Hangman.
If a deaf kid swears in sign language, does his mom wash his hands with soap?
It’s OK if emo kids always hang from the trees, but if we do it, it’s considered against the law.
What school does a depressed middle school kid go to?
KMS.
I ran over some crippled kids. I told [them] to walk it off!
An American bully goes up to an English kid and says, "You're ugly!"
And the English kid says, "Well, wanna know why you can't play Jenga?"
"Why?" says the bully.
"Because you haven't got a tower."
(some kid crying because hes an orphan and kids are bulling him) teacher:HEY i was a orphan to so if you bully him your basicly trying to bully me too me:OOF teacher:now is somebody not here? me:your parents
What did the blind kid get for Christmas? He hasn’t seen it yet...
What did the kids with no arms get? He doesn’t know, he’s still trying to figure out how to open it. :))))
My grandpa said, "You kids rely on too much electronics." I said, well we will see about that. *unplugging life support* me: *oops*