Kid jokes
What's the difference between three dead babies and a Ferrari?
I don't own a Ferrari.
Your momma is so fat, when she chose a yellow shirt when she was on a run, the kids ran after her because they thought they missed the bus.
Why should you always be friends with an emo kid?
They always hang around.
What is the name of a show for kids?
Barney.
How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb? None, they can't change anything.
I am just kidding, you know gay jokes aren't funny, come on guys.
Q: Why did the emo kid get jealous on Xmas?
A: He saw the ornaments hanging.
Why do some kids only experience 364 days per year?
Because they don't have a Father's Day.
Parents are like food—not all kids get them.
When I was at work, I saw this kid crying. I said, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working in an orphanage.
What did the kid with no arms get for Christmas?
A pair of gloves!
Nah, I’m not that mean, he’s still trying to open his presents.
Him: *slowly drives past elementary school while looking at kids*
Her: Why are you staring at those kids? *jokingly* Are you like a pedophile or something?
Him: ... At least you know why I love calling you "baby" now~
Mom tells her son to go to the other kid, to walk to the kid just standing still, to clap so the kid can hear and move out of the way of the car.
But her son was blind, the other kid had no legs so he couldn't walk, and the kid has no arms so he couldn't clap, and the kid died because he couldn't hear; he was deaf.
Why are transgender people like confused kids?
Because they both don't know what they want to be in life.
What game do emo kids love the most?
Hangman.
How are rape and an airplane similar?
The ride gets more annoying when the kid starts screaming.
Orphans and Chinese people can’t play baseball. The orphans can’t find home, and the Chinese kid will eat the bat.
Why are gay men better than straight women?
Because gay men are more willing to look after kids once they swallow them.
Knock knock. Who's there? Colin! Colin who? Colonisation!
Just kidding, colonisers don't knock before they come in.
What do you call a white kid who kills another?
Russia vs Ukraine hahaha.
I asked this disabled kid what his favorite TV show is. He looked at me blankly and said "My favorite TV show is Vegetales."