Kid jokes
If a school shooter walks into a classroom and shoots an autistic kid, what does the kid say? "Why do I look like Swiss cheese?"
Why did the van cross the road?
To get to the school for the little kids.
When Michael Jackson died, people melted him down into Lego pieces so that little kids could play with him instead.
A kid asks his father, "How long is our trip, Dad?"
The kid's father says, "Our trip is a Fortnite."
What do you call an epileptic kid eating fruits?
A blender.
Why did Michael Jackson name his kid Blanket?
What would you call a cover for your cock?
How does a disabled kid walk to school?
He wishes he had the facilities to.
What did the Chinese family name their retarded kid? Something Wong.
What’s the difference between an apple and a depressed kid? The apple falls from the tree.
Why does the adopted kid like playing GTA? Because he wants to be wanted.
There is one difference between autistic kids and vegetarians.
They're both vegetables in serotonin ways.
A little kid was lost, and he asked me to find his home. I love working at the orphanage.
What do you call an emo kid with light-up shoes? A human chandelier.
I may not be as "rich" as Donald Trump, but at least I am still allowed to go on holiday to Bali, Niagara Falls, Hong Kong, and the Pyramids of Giza.
Orange Jesus can't travel to these places because these places cannot grant entry to felons.
...ah, who am I kidding? It's likely that Trump is going to prison, anyway.
How do you punch 40 kids in the face at once? Hit them with a “Sandy Hook”.
Where do rape victims buy their clothes from?
The kids section.
Kid with Cancer: "When I get older, I want to be a movie star or a singer."
Nurse: *Laughs*
Kid: "Why are you laughing?"
Nurse: "When I get OLDER."
Proceeds to laugh.
Why can’t Helen Keller have kids?
Answer: She’s dead.
My kids found me in the family tree. I was hanging there for hours.
Why do more men than women support abortion? So they can keep raping women and the victims will just abort their kids to not have to relive the experience!