Kid

Kid jokes

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Relationship

  • Dad: Are you gay?

    Kid: Yes.

    10 days later.

    Kid: I’m going to my girlfriend's house.

    Dad: I thought you were gay?

    Kid: What’s wrong with you? He’s the girly girl of our relationship, dumba**.

    Dad: Don’t swear and okay, bud.

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    Gift

  • It’s Christmas and Sally has a gift. She got a Barrie. Just kidding, she still hasn’t opened it.

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  • Orphan

  • There was a kid sitting in a corner.

    Me: "Hey! Why are you here at an orphanage?"

    Orphan: "..."

    Me: "Oh, wait, you're an orphan."

    Monster

  • Luca’s Mom and Dad be throwing the kids into the fountain in the city, but they're sea monsters, so if they went to jail for that, they would be on death row anyway. 🤣

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    Drug

  • D.A.R.E. Lion Mascot: Don't take drugs kids!

    Me: My therapist says I need those to live.

    D.A.R.E. Lion Mascot: _escorts to school counselor_

    Orphan

  • What is the difference between a tall kid and an orphan? One is tall enough that their parents can see them.

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