Kid jokes
Met the emo kid today; he was pretty chill; he was just hanging out.
I told a crying kid to wipe his tears and come back smiling.
He never came back the next day, says the local news.
I gave an emo kid money.
He gave me the great depression.
It’s Christmas and Sally has a gift. She got a Barrie. Just kidding, she still hasn’t opened it.
What do you call a gay kid on fire?
Knock knock. Who's there? Colin! Colin who? Colonisation!
Just kidding, colonisers don't knock before they come in.
Who robs and breaks into people's houses?
What is the difference between a tall kid and an orphan? One is tall enough that their parents can see them.
Some kid: Hey, did you know there's an orphanage down the street?!
Me: NO WAY! Wanna check it out?
Kid: NO, IT'S HAUNTED!!
Me: Haunted my ass, let's go!
Kid: Wait, isn't your house also haunted???
Me: Yea
Kid 1: Do you know Candace?
Kid 2: Candace who?
Kid 1: Candace dick fit in your mouth!
Two kids told their parents they saw a man late at night entering their house on Christmas night.
The day later, they found out several houses were robbed.
Kid finds genie lamp, wishes to be Batman.
Genie: You're now an orphan.
Some weird kid came into school today with his tagging gun. He tagged my friend really good. At the end, he tagged 12 students and 1 teacher. VICTORY ROAYAL ✌
Why is there a middle school?
Because the kids that go there are middle class families.
My name is Devonair.
When I get a haircut, it's always bald.
Kids make fun of me, they call me "dang-near bald head."
My name is Devonair *dev-on-near*
I always thought they were making fun of me because of my name pronounced near.
As a kid, I was made to walk the plank.
Because we couldn't afford a dog.
When I was a kid, my mother told me I could be anyone I wanted to be.
Turns out, I'm just a burden.
"Addison, are you one of those kids who are very, very, very, very smart? Because you sound like one."
Kid: I want to be like Batman.
Genie: I can make arrangements. The kid comes home, both of his parents are dead.
Genie: I told you.
Kid: .............................................
What do you get when you cross an adopted kid with a river?
Moses hits the adoption lottery!