Joke

Joke jokes

Rape

I know you don’t like rape jokes, but I’m gonna force one on you anyway.

  • 7
  • Sex Offender

    What did the sex offender frog say to the other sex offender frog when a hot frog passed them?

    Rrrrrapeit!

    Atom

    Two atoms were walking on a street. One atom said to the other: "I'm feeling really positive today," and the other replied: "I know. I stole your electron." Then the first atom said "How Ionic."

    Memes

    Wheelchair

    One day I was jogging through the park and I saw this lady sitting next to a pond in a wheelchair with no legs and arms and said "Why are you crying" she said she had never been hugged I gave her a hug and jogged away.The next day i saw her again and asked her the same question she said "I've never been kissed" I gave her a kiss and went, The third day i asked her thrice and she said I've never been fucked I picked her up from her wheelchair and throwed her in the pond and said your fucked now She didn't make it:)

    Candy

    You: Say "addicted" after everything I say.

    Person: Uh okay.

    You: When you're obsessed with candy you are...?

    Person: Addicted.

    You: When you're obsessed with drugs you are...?

    Person: Addicted.

    You: What hit you in the face last night?

    Person: Addicted... *laughs*

    (It's supposed to sound like "A dick did")

    Cow

    What do you call a cow who plays an instrument? -- A moosician.

  • 1
  • Sally

    Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

    Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

    What first went through Sally's head when the Nazis came? A bullet.

    Where did Sally go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

    What did Sally get for Christmas? A bike.

  • 2
  • Chemist

    How can you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber?

    Ask them to pronounce "unionized".

    People

    Did you know the people in the twin towers were great readers?

    Yeah, they went through 80 stories in seconds.

    Orphan

    Why do orphans have water in their cereal?

    Because their dad never came home with the milk.

    Daredevil

    What's the difference between a prostitute and a daredevil?

    One has cunning stunts, whilst the other has a stunning...

    Part

    What's the best part about a dead prostitute?

    The second hour is free.

    Orphan

    Why do orphans hate milk? Cause their family is still shopping for it!

    Forever

    On the lines of "I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous,"

    I'm dying to live forever!

    Baby

    How do you stop a baby from crawling? Nail its hand to the floor.