Joke jokes
What did the doctor say to the Chinese man?
"Some ting wong."
What's green and has a thousand nipples?
A garbage bag in the alley behind a breast cancer clinic.
My life is a joke.
What time is it when you smell garbage? Time to run!
Depression jokes are like food... not every people get it.
Were Japanese suicide bombers taught to fly, or was it just a quick crash course?
What did the rapper say to his broken pencil?
"You're just not SHARP enough for my lyrics!"
Someone locked me out of my house today... At least the children in my basement aren't my problem anymore.
Q) What is the ONLY zodiac sign ever to be surgically removed?
A) Cancer.
What did the cannibal say when his friend fell on the floor?
"5 second rule!"
You know we straight with doin' your mom.
Timmy had 66 toys. He said it was "2 many (662)," so he gave them to Mr. Divide. He gave 21. Equals flip it over! It’s weird.
Why did the mushroom get a new house?
Because there wasn’t mushroom!
What does it mean when a man sits on a boulder instead of on the ground? A bolder choice.
Moose jokes, why did the moose fly with an airplane? Because it was a skoose.
I gave a blind kid a gun. I told him it was a hair dryer.
You. Me. Gas station. What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh! There was a roofie in our gas station sushi. We black out and wake up in a sewer surrounded by fish.
Horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy. The stench draws in a bear. What do we do? We're gonna fight it. Bear fight. Bare handed. Bare, naked? Oh, yes please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl and ride it into a Chuck E. Cheese. Dance Dance Revolution. Revolution? Overthrow the government? Uh, I think so. Next thing you know, I'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. Then I turn into a jet, fly into the sun, black out again, wake up, do a bump, white out, which I didn't even know you could do. Then I smoked a joint, greened out. Then I turn into the sun. Uh oh! Looks like the meth is kicking in. aklfhaofhasfahfakh AAAAAAAAA afahfioahflkf AAAAA
Why can’t orphans order from Costa?
They need a parent or guardian with them.
What do you call a flying skunk?
A smelicopter.
When the school shooter gives the autistic kid a glock and he shoots himself, thinking it’s a cigarette.