Joke jokes
What do you call an ugly, grey thing?
Cinderelephant!
Once I asked Siri to tell me a joke, and it asked me, "What is the difference between a large pizza and you?" One can feed a family.
Why can't Stephen Hawking go to heaven?
'Cause he'd walk up the stairs!
Why did the cow cross the road to go to the moovies?
What is a necrophiliac's safe word?
"I'm alive!"
Why did the black lady give the IRS a mason jar full of watermelon seeds?
Tax credit.
This is a link to a YouTube channel. No joke text provided.
Yesterday I went to a lightbulb party, and it was lit.
What time is it when you say I can’t walk anymore? Time to get a wheelchair 🦼.
What did a comedian say at a show full of blind people?
"What's up?"
"Did you hear about the guy who got the left side of his body amputated? He’s all right now."
Do you know what my favorite time of day is?
6:30, hands down.
What’s the difference between a leaf and an emo kid falling out of a tree? The leaf reaches the ground.
What type of horse can jump higher than a house?
All houses can't jump.
What do you call a suspicious dog?
A sussy bark-er.
What do you call it when you drop a bottle of food dye?
"It's dye-ing."
What do you get when you cross a mosquito with a mountain climber?
Nothing. You can't cross a vector and a scalar.
I'm ashamed to admit feeling proud of the rape joke I posted and what went on between me and your mum.
Let's get this right. What's the difference between an egg and a wank?
You can beat an egg, but you can't beat...
Are you a building?
Cuz I rate you 9/11.