Joke jokes
What do you call a flat emo girl?
A cutting board.
Me: You know what's the favorite slogan that Hindus like the most?
My friend: What?
Me: “kati supari kata paan katiyo ko bhejo pakistan.”
Dad, there was one day I was playing jump rope with a pig, and then I made pulled pork out of him.
Son, he is dinner.
What did the fat guy say when he fell off the ladder? "Catch me!"
Confucius say, "Man who bite electric wire get shocking experience!"
Your hairline is so far back that I can't even back out of my car.
There were 3 blonde scientists...wait that’s not the joke. The first one said “we are going to pilot the first unmanned spacecraft to land on the sun.”
The second one said “but we can’t do that - if we get within 5 feet of the sun we’ll freeze to death!”
The third blonde says “so we go at night.”
How do you stop a bull from charging? Cancel its credit card.
Why did the rapper bring a dictionary on stage?
To DEFINE his rap game!
Why did 7 kill 11?
Because now 7 was even.
What's the funniest joke ever?
Rapboat thinking he can rap.
Eggs
You crack me up!
Women are like marshmallows because they are white, squashy, and we put our sticks inside you.
Me: Sorry I couldn’t make it to school yesterday, I had an appointment.
Teacher: What kind of appointment?
Me: I had an appointment with a cut day. 😈😈😈
True story.
What’s the hardest part of a vegetable? The wheelchair.
Hi, here's a joke: You're wasting your time and space, you know it... :D
My parents said to me, "Whenever you say sorry to someone and they say, 'It's okay,' it's really not."
So I said, "Okay."
What's the difference between an orphan and a baby?
The orphan gets back up.
Your mama is so far that when she told a joke, no one was laughing, but the floor was literally cracking up.
Why did I trip over your foot?
Because you were so short I couldn’t see you!