Joke jokes
What's the difference between a potted plant and your wife?
The first is easier to bury.
So, a bear and a rabbit are in a field. The bear turns to the rabbit and asks, "Does your poop stick to your fur?" The rabbit replied, "No." Then the bear picks up the rabbit and wipes his butt.
What did the penis say to the condom?
"Cover me, I'm going in!"
These jokes are nearly as dead as Steven Hawkings.
What do you call a cool octopus?
Tenta-cool (tentacle)
8008135 is my favorite number.
The worst ratio is 6:9.
And last but not least, "Why was six afraid of seven?" Seven eight nine. But why was six with nine? Because when you put them together, you get 69. But why was six mad at nine? Because Nine eight six, too.
Ha! It asked me to submit a joke, but then I realized I'm the joke.
You wanna hear a joke about my penis?
Never mind, it’s too long.
A wife asked her husband, "What do you like most in me, my pretty face or my sexy body?"
He looked at her from head to toe and replied, "I like your sense of humor!"
Why did the blonde stare at the Ford?
Because it said, "Focus."
There are 206 bones in my body.
When I look at you, it becomes 207.
What kind of man would be a lesbian's best friend? A decimen.
If I don't get a partner for Christmas this year, mistletoe won't be the only thing hanging from the ceiling.
What do you call two lesbians in a closet?
A liquor cabinet.
A wife says to her husband, "You're always pushing me around and talking behind my back." "What do you expect?" he says, "You're in a fucking wheelchair!"
What were the emo kid's pronouns?
Was/were.
My mum told me to stop telling the suicidal jokes.
I replied with: "Don't worry, suicide would be the last thing I'd do."
What do you call a terrorist in water?
A bath bomb 😁
One man's trash is another man's treasure. That sucks when you are adopted.
If you drive a Lamborghini, then you have a tiny weenie.