Joke jokes
What do you call a sick eagle?
Ill-eagle! 😂
How do angels 😇 make holy water 💧?
They boil the hell out of it.
Why does Aaron always look depressed? Because his grandma's dead.
People say, "I like your cut G." Which is when you get a fresh cut. But I guess when you go bald, we can say, "Like your forehead, G."
I know it's really, really, really, really bad.
What do you say to a ugly girl who claims to have been raped?
“Are you sure you didn’t rape him?”
What's the difference between a potted plant and your wife?
The first is easier to bury.
What’s the difference between an alligator and a child?
You can’t abuse an alligator.
What did the penis say to the condom?
"Cover me, I'm going in!"
These jokes are nearly as dead as Steven Hawkings.
What do you call a rich Chinese person?!? Kaching!
What do you call a cool octopus?
Tenta-cool (tentacle)
Ha! It asked me to submit a joke, but then I realized I'm the joke.
8008135 is my favorite number.
The worst ratio is 6:9.
And last but not least, "Why was six afraid of seven?" Seven eight nine. But why was six with nine? Because when you put them together, you get 69. But why was six mad at nine? Because Nine eight six, too.
You wanna hear a joke about my penis?
Never mind, it’s too long.
I did a knock knock joke to an orphan. I said, "Knock knock." He said, "Who is there?" And I said, "Not your parents."
Me: I'm home, ma! Here's her with a new dad. Her: Go hang with someone. Me: Gets the noose, goes to fav tree. I love you, ma. 🙂
If I told you, you had a nice body, would you hold it against me?
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? An apple gets picked.
I would make a dad joke, but I don't have a dad to joke about.
What do you call a kid in a wheelchair on fire?
Hot wheels.