What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? An apple gets picked.
Joke Jokes
Why couldn’t the dairy farmer find his home? He lost the whey!😅
What's the difference between dad jokes and bad jokes?
The letter b.
Me: Are you okay?
Dentist: I'm just a bit surprised. When I said to you "spit it out," I wasn't expecting you to say you've been shagging my wife.
What do you call a funny mountain?
Hill-arious.
I was going to tell a 9/11 joke, but it was really plane.
Two nuts were walking down the street, and one was a-salted!
What is the difference between a light bulb and a pregnant woman?
You can unscrew a light bulb.
The worst joke ever.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9.
Why was 9 thankful to 6? Because 6 8 7 2.
Why did Sally fall off of the swing?
Because she has no arms.
Knock knock.
"Who's there?"
Not Sally.
What do you call a prostitute with no arms or legs?
Cash and carry.
Why did the boy put the potatoes 🥔 on the kitchen floor?
He wanted to mash potatoes!
To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office: I will find you... You have my Word.
If I don't get a partner for Christmas this year, mistletoe won't be the only thing hanging from the ceiling.
Why are obese jokes so offensive?
Because fat people have enough on their plate.
Roses are red, flowers are pretty, I heard your mom has a nice pair of titties.
What were the emo kid's pronouns?
Was/were.
There are 206 bones in my body.
When I look at you, it becomes 207.
A wife says to her husband, "You're always pushing me around and talking behind my back." "What do you expect?" he says, "You're in a fucking wheelchair!"
What do you call a terrorist in water?
A bath bomb 😁
