Joke jokes
What’s the difference between an alligator and a child?
You can’t abuse an alligator.
What did the penis say to the condom?
"Cover me, I'm going in!"
What do you call a rich Chinese person?!? Kaching!
These jokes are nearly as dead as Steven Hawkings.
What do you call a cool octopus?
Tenta-cool (tentacle)
What is another name for a serial rapist? Short dress enthusiast.
Ha! It asked me to submit a joke, but then I realized I'm the joke.
You wanna hear a joke about my penis?
Never mind, it’s too long.
A wife asked her husband, "What do you like most in me, my pretty face or my sexy body?"
He looked at her from head to toe and replied, "I like your sense of humor!"
What’s another term for a lesbian?
A vagetarian.
What do you call two lesbians in a closet?
A liquor cabinet.
Why are obese jokes so offensive?
Because fat people have enough on their plate.
What kind of man would be a lesbian's best friend? A decimen.
If I don't get a partner for Christmas this year, mistletoe won't be the only thing hanging from the ceiling.
What does one orphan say to another orphan on Opposite Day? "Do you want to go home?"
Teacher: Hey Timmy (the quiet kid), what comes after X?
The quiet kid: Splosion.
Teacher: What comes after A?
The quiet kid: AK-47.
Teacher: Faints.
That joke didn't land well, did it?
There are 206 bones in my body.
When I look at you, it becomes 207.
A wife says to her husband, "You're always pushing me around and talking behind my back." "What do you expect?" he says, "You're in a fucking wheelchair!"
What were the emo kid's pronouns?
Was/were.