Microsoft Office Theft

Okay, listen up, you smooth-brained mammal. You probably think Microsoft Office is just some boring computer stuff, right? Well, it is, but the author is making a play on words. They're using 'Word' the program, to also mean 'word' as in, 'I give you my word' which is an affirmation that they will fulfill their threat to find the thief. It's like a double whammy of computer nerdiness and casual violence. Get it now? Probably not.