Joke

Joke jokes

Eye

What do you say to a girl with two black eyes?

Nothing, you told her twice.

Joe Biden

Why doesn’t Joe Biden visit children with cancer in hospitals?

Because he can’t sniff their hair.

Student

The good thing about being gay in school is that you can be the best student and still get all the D's.

Hairline

When I was in middle school, I was on my bus and people were doin' hairline jokes, and I heard this guy say, "Your hairline goes back to... uhhhhhh... 2042?"

Dad

When does a joke become a dad joke? When it leaves you and never comes back.

Pen

Why did the pen stop writing?

'Cause the pen wasn't very dependable.

Fire

Give a man fire, and he'll be warm for a day.

Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

Funeral

My relatives always teased me during weddings, saying, "You'll be next!"

But they stopped when I did the same to them during funerals.

Beer Bottle

How many men does it take to open a bottle of beer?

A: None, it should be opened by the time she brings it.

Brother

I hate when my brother dates other people.

Just kidding! 😡😡😡😡

Lamp

What do you call a large lamp that does illicit things to young children?

A Jacko Lantern!