Special Olympics jokes
What do you call a person with Down syndrome in the military?
Special Forces.
Husband: "Honey, I just bought these special Olympic-style condoms!"
Wife: "Olympic-style condoms? What makes them so special?"
Husband: "They come in three colors: gold, silver, and bronze."
Wife: "Ooh, sweet. What color are you going to wear tonight?"
Husband: "Gold, of course!"
Wife: "Why don't you wear silver? It would be nice if you came second for a change."
What’s better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics?
Not being retarded.
How can you be fast and slow at the same time, getting a gold medal in the Special Olympics?
What's the difference between a Russian potato and a U.S. potato?
The U.S. potato can still compete in the Special Olympics.
Recent attempts to defund Special Olympics have organizers scrambling to come up with more corporate sponsorship... targeted companies include:
Kleenex
Depends
Bicycle Helmet manufacturers
Velcro Shoe manufacturers
Steven Hawkings Publishers
What do you call a bunch of biracial, retarded kids? The Special Olympics.
The Somalian Olympics Team has just apologized to the Olympic Committee after realizing that sailing and shooting were two separate events.
I kicked a soccer ball at the kid in the wheelchair. Now we're playing Rocket League.
I met a guy in a wheelchair today. His face was battered and bruised. "What happened to your face?" I asked.
"I'm a Paralympian," he replied.
"Boxing?"
"No, ... hurdles."
I'm doing a charity bungee jump for the local disabled.
It's called "spastics on elastics."
What's better than winning gold at the Paralympics?
Not being retarded.