Joke jokes

What do you call a kid in a wheelchair coming out of a building on fire? Hot wheels.

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Lion 🦁.

Lion who?

Lion again, aren't you?

The best joke in the world is me.

Don't say that you're not a joke. Jokes have meanings.

What do you find up a ghost's nose? A BOOger.

How are Kentucky Fried Chicken and a woman the same?

Once you take away the legs and the breasts, you’re left with one greasy box to put your bone in.

What's a joke that an orphan has never heard before?

A dad joke.

How can you surprise someone who is blind?

Leave a plunger in the toilet.

I asked my mom what is dark humor. She said "see them boy over there in the wheelchair, ask him to walk." I said, "but I’m blind." She responded, "Exactly."

I'm so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes closed.

What's the best way to catch a fish? Ask someone to throw it to you.

What does the suicidal person say on New Years?

"New year, no me."

What’s the difference between dark jokes and cotton?

Some people don’t pick it.

I have some jokes about unemployed people, but none of them work.

In honor of Diddy:

The ice cream machine at McDonald's now works!

What is an orphan's family tree?

A stump.

I hate prom in Alabama. They always say, "Uhh, actually this is our family reunion." We are in Alabama, so they are the same thing.

I was walking down the street and saw a kid and I said, "Are you an orphan?"

He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?"

I said, "Your parents at first."

What’s a kidnapper's favorite shoe brand?

White vans.

How do you make a sad person jump?

A bridge.

What does a pedophile mostly pound on a piano?

A minor.