Joke jokes
I've been trying to find jokes about gouging my eyes out, but I couldn't see any.
Why didn’t the bike stand on its own?
It was too tired.
Person: I broke my arm in three places.
Doctor: Well, don't go to those three places then.
What do you get if you cross diarrhea with incest?
I don't know.
Neither do I, but it runs in the family.
I once told Siri, "Hey Siri, why am I still single?" She opened the front camera.
What place has more boys than the Catholic Church? Michael Jackson's bedroom.
What do you call a Chinese person with no legs?
Lim Ping.
So here's the joke. A bear walks into a bar and sits down and then....then..........then................................zzzz
Stop making 9/11 jokes. They don't land so well.
Hey, I know this is a classic joke but I found it pretty funny!
"My name is 4, four like the number," my friend said. "What, was 1 2 3 taken?"
I can even with it but I was bored and decided to share this.
What do you call a spaceman’s willy?
A Shuttlecock!
Read this slow: I 1 2 4 Q?
You're not completely useless. You can always be used as a bad example.
I asked my mom what is dark humor. She said "see them boy over there in the wheelchair, ask him to walk." I said, "but I’m blind." She responded, "Exactly."
What does the suicidal person say on New Years?
"New year, no me."
What is red and cries and spins around and around?
- A baby in a microwave.
What is the difference between an illegal immigrant and E.T.?
E.T. eventually went home!
A young boy is stood on the top of a cliff crying. A priest approaches and says, "Why are you crying my son?" "My parents just crashed the car off the cliff and died." "It's just not your day today is it?" Said the priest, unbuttoning his flies.
What do Civil War veterans and pedophiles have in common?
They both prefer Minnie (mini) balls.
How are Kentucky Fried Chicken and a woman the same?
Once you take away the legs and the breasts, you’re left with one greasy box to put your bone in.