Joke jokes

What’s one thing orphans don’t have on their computer? A home page.

I heard a joke about candy bars, but it wasn't very funny, so I just snickered.

"What do you call a deer with no eyes?" -- "No-eye-deer."

Brian has a crush on a cute girl, Sally, from school, so he goes and tells his dad about her, and he says, "Sorry, son, you can't like her; she is your sister." So Brian is okay with it, and he starts to like another girl, Madison, and he goes up to his dad and says, "I have a crush on this girl, Madison," and again the dad goes, "Oh, sorry, son, you can't like any girl in school; they are all your sisters." So he goes crying to his mom and says, "Dad said I can't like any girl because they are all my sisters," and the mom goes, "Oh, it's okay; you can like any girl you want because he is not your dad."

Why shouldn't you buy Russian underpants?

Because Chernobyl fallout.

What did the comedian say when he walked into a bank?

"This is a stand-up."

I'm at my happiest point in life. I'm dating someone that's autistic, and I was just saying I needed someone special in my life.

Why was 8 afraid of 7?

Because 7 was a 6 offender.

What's the problem with 9/11 jokes?

They are just two plane.

I bought a guh on the weekend.

(what's a guh?)

GUHZZLE DEEZ NUTS! 🥜 🔩 🌰

"Don't worry! Life goes on."

"Yeah, that's what's had me worried."

You were sleeping, it didn't count - Chloe Foxwell 2021:)))))))

What's the difference between a light bulb and a pregnant lady?

You can unscrew a light bulb.

So, I was at a stand up comedy show in Russia where the comedian was making fun of Putin. The jokes weren’t that good, but I loved the execution.

When you’re playing dead and the school shooter starts unbuckling his belt and you hear him say, “This boy always had a fat ass.”

I met this girl at a bar and started doing her from behind. Everything was great until she turned and said, "My turn!"

This is NOT my joke. I found it on Google. It's a texting joke.

Mom: Son, your grandma just passed away LOL.

Son: Mom, what do you mean LOL? That means laughing out loud.

Mom: Oh no, I thought that meant lots of love. I have to text everyone back!!!!

The joke is my life.

What's an Emo's favorite drink?

Water, JK it's cyanide.

My favorite joke is my life.