Joke jokes

I saw my friend hang themselves. My response was, I guess they wanted to hang with someone.

This is NOT my joke. I found it on Google. It's a texting joke.

Mom: Son, your grandma just passed away LOL.

Son: Mom, what do you mean LOL? That means laughing out loud.

Mom: Oh no, I thought that meant lots of love. I have to text everyone back!!!!

The joke is my life.

Two men are hunting. One asks: "Did you ever hunt bear?" The other one answers: "No, but one time I went fishing in my shorts."

What's an Emo's favorite drink?

Water, JK it's cyanide.

My favorite joke is my life.

So, a few hours ago my friend said I need to CUT it out with the s/h jokes... like... it's really not that deep?

My friend told me my wrist wasn't a cutting board. So I asked her if hers was at all, and if I could borrow it.

People joke about 9/11, but it's not funny. My dad died in 9/11. Best pilot in Saudi Arabia.

Why can't Miss Piggy count to 70?

Because when she gets to 69 there's a frog in her throat.

This page could use more "butt quack" jokes.

What did the maxi pad say to the fart? "You are the wind beneath my wings."

Why was Helen Keller's belly button bruised?

Her boyfriend was blind too.

I told my mum the refrigerator was running, so she got dressed and ran after it...

what do you call a chicken who crossed the road?........suicidal.

What do a coin and an Irish man have in common?

They're both fun to flip off.

4, 6, 8, and 9 have all been killed. 2, 3, 5, 7, and 11 are the prime suspects.

I was hit on by President Kennedy, too bad I shot him down.

In death, what is the only organ in a woman's body to remain warm?

My dick.

What is a Mexican's favorite sport?

Cross country.