Job jokes

Why did the man get fired from work? Because he took two days off in February.

- I work with animals.

- Great! What job?

- A butcher.

My job is so amazing.

Today a man asked me to check his balance, so I pushed him over. His balance isn't good.

Why is being an electrician the easiest job in the world? It's literally light work.

My dad died in 9/11.

He was a good pilot.

What would you name a detective if he didn't already have a name?

Cassie.

Get it?

What is the definition of kinky according to a Canadian?

Giving a blowjob to a man who is well-endowed while he is eating a tuna fish sandwich with maple syrup instead of mayonnaise.

Hi, my name is Meer Adnan Hussain. I am a Muslim. I live in Karachi, an area of Pakistan. I want this job. I am interested in this work. Please take me in this work. Your porn star, Meer Adnan Hussain. Wait for your email. Okay.

I get paid more than $200 to $400 per hour for working online. I heard about this job 3 months ago, and after joining this, I have earned easily $30k from this without having online working skills. Simply give it a shot on the accompanying site...

Here is I started.............>> fixpay1.blogspot.com

What did the builder say after the foundation?

"Employees!"

"I'd love to give everyone another shot."

Harry, 26, works at the women's clinic.

I want to be a pornstar. Even if I completely suck, they will still give me a firm raise.

My nephew hated working outside in landscaping, so I got him a job in the twin towers; I don't know why he keeps complaining about it being an inside job.

When a woman is something weeks or months pregnant and her stomach has a visible bump, everyone rubs her tummy, but no one tickles the husband's balls and says, "Good job, buddy!"

What is a Care Bear's favorite job?

Take care of bears.

Leo must be an INTERIOR DECORATOR... because when she enters a room, it becomes UGLY.

Looks like URL encoding is enabled for special characters inside comments. Good job to whoever developed this website!

My boss said “dress for the job you want, not for the job you have.” So I went in as Batman.

Watchdogs.

I had some puns about construction, but I'm still working on them.